If there is one thing that every woman should read this year, it is this goddamn book.
My mother’s best friend, (basically my godmother), gifted me this book for my 21st birthday. I am just starting to chart my entry into the world of lone living, working, balancing friends, family and work, and 21 just felt the appropriate time to recieve something like this. As one of the strongest women I know, alongside my own lovely mother, I felt she must have given it to me for a reason, and I was compelled to give it a go.
Boy, did it deliver!
Very often, life has you feeling like you might physically explode from the ‘injustice’ of it all. It’s the little things: that deadline you’ve been slaving away at for 6 hours that isn’t nearly finished; the fact that after going resolutely to the gym for a year and becoming a slave to vegetables every mealtime, that you’re still puffing away after climbing forum hill; that imbecile of a man at work who decided that it would be appropriate to suggest, ‘oh, but isn’t this a task for a guy to do?’, and your lovely mother- who, bless her, wants your advice on which shoes go best with which shirt for her dinner party: ‘Mum, you’ve been dressing yourself for I-don’t-know-how-many years. Now is really not the time.’
It has you reaching for the wine bottle, (more likely a box).
But, trust me, this book is a saviour. It can be so daunting looking into the future at your 20-something to 30-something self and thinking: ‘Oh sh*t, I’ve got to do the whole mess of relationships, jobs, family, food, friends all on my own. But, fear no more! Straight from the very real, living proof that you are most definitely not alone in these treacherous times, is this gem of a book.
From the creators of ‘The Pool’, a forum for women to post articles and use their burgeoning voices on issues that matter to them, comes “Life Honestly: Strong Opinions from Smart Women”. (see here- it’s like HCX- but for post-uni women) Discussing everything from “The Trouble with Compliments in a Post #MeToo World” to “The Importance of Maintaining a Girl Gang” right through to the emboldened “Truth about Post-Birth Vaginas”, this book is a win.
These smart, real, sexy, amazing women have written articles for women about their own experience as women: and what could be more down to Earth, more helpful, more empowering than that?
To really note the importance of such dialogue and advice between women, for women, and especially those just entering their 20s, I turn to the words of the editor of this collection of articles, Sam Baker:
“It’s no exaggerration to say my life was saved by an article I read in a woman’s magazine. The article in question ran in Cosmopolitan a very long time ago. […] It was about something called “charm syndrome” […] the earliest iteration of what we know as coercive control. Thanks to that article decades ago, a light bulb went on in the head of a terrifyingly young me, giving me the strength to step out of something that was very bad for me indeed, and went on to have lifelong repercussions. Although those repercussions would have been worse and my life might have been a great deal shorter had I not read this article.
[…]
When women come together, we can move mountains, just look at the Repeal the Eighth Movement (legalising abortion in Ireland). On these pages you will find the tiniest taster of many millions of words. From bad sex to bad boys, from periods to body positivity to equal pay to the power of female friendship.
Read on, and maybe together we can move some mountains.
Sam x”
Just looking at Exeter’s Laura Jackson and HCX’s own Ruby Jones championing their ‘Januhairy’ movement this year, you can see why these discourses have a place in our world. Not only have the women writing these articles become trailblazers for us, the early 20-somethings just joining the fold. We, too, can become trail blazers just by running with their advice.
So, take my advice, whether you’re 21, 15, or 36: read this book, and feel instantly a little less alone, and a little more positive about being your own beautiful self.