A very moving post I read on Facebook recently detailed how the author did not want to be called “brave” for speaking out about their depression. Somehow, however, we still think it is “brave” and “courageous” to speak out about mental health in a way that is different to speaking out about physical ailments. I am perfectly confident to talk about suffering with pneumonia last term, something that deeply affected me and my functioning; if this diagnosis was schizophrenia, how would my perception of telling others change?
This problem is ubiquitous amongst university students and the public alike, simply talking about our mental wellness and how this may have been compromised is seen as not only scary but often taboo. In the student community, this is heightened, as admitting that you’re not alright in any sense may deviate you from the norm and alienate you from university culture. Being able to turn down a night out was fine when I was on antibiotics for pneumonia, but if I claimed I wasn’t attending due to feeling down, well-meaning friends may brush it aside. I know I have been one to argue with my friends when they aren’t conforming to usual university social activities, and despite being an advocate for talking about mental health and wellbeing, I often question my attention to detail when it comes to my friends.
Conversely, how often do we question our friends throwing themselves a little too much into university culture? Maybe you have that friend that is always baked, or the friend that sleeps until 5pm every day because they were pinging last night and can’t face their lectures. Maybe you’re that person. The ways of coping with emotional distress are individual to everyone, and some are healthier than others. The question is, how often do we confront those unhealthy habits in our friends, and even in ourselves?
The fundamental underlie is that we do not talk about mental health in the way we should, and it’s not really our fault. Talking about how well we are coping can be hard; we are aware of the problems, we invite people to open up to us, but saying “I think I have depression” to a friend is very different to an attentive friend noticing a behaviour change and tackling it head on. We need to tackle, and we need to keep to our promises to friends and ourselves to be weary of our mental wellbeing. As a medic, 1 in 4 of the patients I see in my professional career will be struggling or will have struggled with a mental illness and it is my professional prerogative to address these head on and signpost to help where possible. But it should also be my prerogative as a friend, colleague and student to do the same for peers.
So, here is a list of ways to break the boundaries surrounding mental health and get help for yourself and those you care for in university:
- Have the talk. It is scary, but, be it with yourself or someone you care about, if you think there’s an issue honesty and forwardness fare better than leaving it unsaid and watching things get worse.
- Go to your GP/advise a trip to the GP. A GP, as for physical ailments, is the first port of call, and will be understanding, supportive and encouraging to those struggling with their mental health. They can signpost and refer to outpatient services that may be of aid and can assess where the journey of recovery needs to go to achieve a healthy and long-lasting positive outlook.
- Wellbeing. The wellbeing services we have here at Exeter are brilliant and accessing them after a referral from the GP or with a previously accrued diagnosis is as simple as sending in a form.
- Remember that there is always on-campus support. Whether it is student led opportunities for group support sessions, or societies such as B-EAT or Mind Your Head, those in the know will never be far away. Nightline offers the opportunity to talk to someone at night if things are difficult, and the guild, pastoral/academic tutors and associated staff are all aware of the difficulties of university.
- Be aware of emergency contacts. 111 is an emergency line to a trained medical professional that can walk you through helping a friend or yourself outside of normal office hours. Similarly, estate patrol in Exeter (or the appropriate equivalent services at other universities) can provide confidential support and advice.
- Remember that experiences are real, individualised and valid. Your perception of yourself and/or others shouldn’t be negatively impacted when coming across mental health difficulties. Struggling with one’s mental health is not a fault, and problems related to mental health can affect anyone, of any gender, background, ethnicity or age. There is no shame attached to these diagnoses.