Situationship – noun
Doing everything that couples in relationships do without the official label of a couple.
Many people have their own opinions about these types of “relationships” (if you choose to call it that). Some end up in one-sided relationships where one person wants things to be more serious, whereas the other tries to avoid commitment entirely. Or two people agree on their situation and choose to remain that way without the label. Situationships are between a fine line between simple and complicated, so let’s talk about it, and if you find yourself in one, let’s try to navigate it.
Here are some tips for surviving your situation:
Are you aware of the situation, or are you someone who is likely to let delusion get the best of you?
Some of us let our delusions get the best of us, but this is what makes the situation more unbearable. The idea of expectations and possibilities. Stay grounded.
Establish what both sides want
If Person A is open to sex but not a relationship, and Person B is just exploring their options but is looking for a relationship. Before taking on the situtationship, they should establish what they are looking for romantically. Many people prefer to avoid this because they don’t want to deal with the hard conversations of finding out the two of you don’t want the same thing. Avoid the trouble, ask first
Understand what YOU want
Understanding what you want may save you from getting into sticky situations or causing unrealistic expectations. If you are someone who likes to live on the wild side or someone who is pretty casual about their dating life, establish it and make it known. Though sometimes there are times you find yourself talking to someone and things are progressing fast, don’t be scared. Take a step back and evaluate the situation from afar, ask yourself if you are okay with the way things are going and if you are prepared for where it might go. Do what you believe is in your best interest.
Junior year of high school was my first run-in with this new type of “love.” I liked the guy, and he told me he liked me. So I was under the assumption that means we’re gonna be together, right? 5 months this went on. I found myself crazy about him, but I was so confused. I couldn’t understand how someone could express such intense feelings for someone, but he backed away when the idea of becoming official was brought up. Which brings me to an important point.
—> Know Your Worth, don’t try to convince them to love you
Despite my newfound crush and the delusions of us being together swirling in my mind, I knew I deserved someone who wanted to be with me as I did them. I never viewed our time together as a waste because I think every interaction we have with people is a valuable lesson, and from him, I learned I didn’t want whatever we were doing. I knew there was no point in trying to make him want to be with me. So, I removed myself from the situation entirely.
In the end, remember…
It’s important to understand what kind of situation you are getting yourself into. Some people may look for solely someone to have sex with, while others want the whole relationship package, and others don’t really know what they want, but they like the thought of someone there. Whether you prefer situationships or are the bane of your existence, they serve as a learning lesson for everyone. Communicate your wants and needs and learn to always do what you believe is best.