As we get into the holiday season, it’s only fair that we talk about the queen of fall herself, Gilmore Girls. Thinking about the autumn leaves and the pumpkin spice lattes, I can only picture a warm cup of coffee at Luke’s and curling up with a good book. In the beautiful and quirky town of Stars Hallow, we have our remarkable residents; Lorelai and Rory Gilmore. But let’s talk about Rory and her dating history that we see throughout the show.
There has always been a debate throughout the fandom about who was Rory’s best boyfriend. We see Dean Forester, Jess Mariano, and Logan Huntzberger. We see our little Rory grow into womanhood and deal with her troubled love life, and it’s inevitable that we all have our favorites. This is an extremely intense debate, and I have an extremely controversial opinion. Team Dean.
Yes, you heard that correctly. Often regarded as her worst boyfriend, I truly believe that Dean was her best boyfriend. Truly the best first boyfriend a girl could want, Dean embodies everything good a teen boy could provide. He knew and understood her, they loved each other’s families and he truly loved her. Here are 5 major reasons why Dean is clearly the best boyfriend!
1. He was respectful towards her family and her life at Stars Hallow
Dean made the effort to understand Rory and her dynamic with Lorelai and the strange town of Stars Hallow. As shown in his short conversations with Max Medina, Dean always noticed the small stuff about the two and put effort to learn their quirks and habits. Not to mention how Rory also gets along well with his family and especially his little sister. Jess started on the wrong foot with Lorelai and ended on the wrong foot. The kid stole a beer from her fridge the first time they met!
2. He prioritized Rory
To say he respected Rory is an understatement, he was everything a first boyfriend should be. He understood her, loved just being in her presence, and prioritized her. He knew that Harvard came first for her and he always understood. Only once was he upset, and it was because Rory was neglecting him for weeks on end, and they argued just to communicate their emotions healthily at the end of the episode. Which is extremely mature for a couple of 16-year-olds if you ask me!
3. He defended Rory and was always there for her
Even after the breakup, he was there for her and stood up for her when Jess was being a total creep at the house party. And when Rory broke his heart, he still helped Lorelai with the house and respected Rory. A sign of a good-hearted person and an even better boyfriend. The best. And yes, spoiler, when Dean cheats on his wife with Rory that was obviously a horrible thing to do. But nothing irks me more than when people try to paint the picture that he was a horrible person and that RORY wasn’t to blame either. Rory was selfish and knew she was the other woman, even yelling at her mother that Dean was “hers” despite dumping him and breaking his heart. It was a messy, manipulative scenario that had no winners.
4. He always had romantic gestures that Rory loved
Even if Logan had flashy gestures (because he was a spoiled rich kid) Dean did the most with what he had. I mean, for crying out loud he built her a functional car from scratch. Crafted her a thoughtful bracelet. Couldn’t go a weekend without calling her up and constantly accommodating her. Picking her up at the bus stop or other, he tried to integrate her into his everyday life and vice versa. See if anyone else did that for her.
5. He would do anything for her
From dressing up at the ball to make her happy and indulging in her insane eating habits. Dean did anything and everything for Rory. Even if it made him uncomfortable, he knew that just a day for him would mean the world for her. Dean knew her best out of all her boyfriends and sacrificed the most just to see her smile. As I said, gestures don’t have to be huge flashy expensive gifts like purses (looking at you Logan) but rather notes of attention and care.
Overall, I hate when people also call Dean stupid or say that he had “no ambition”. It’s so unfair to say that just because he wasn’t sure what he wanted to do at 16 and he probably didn’t want to go to college that means he has no ambition and he was a terrible boyfriend. Some of you are in your mid 20’s and still have no clue what you want to do, and that is perfectly okay! And just because Dean didn’t read 100 books a week doesn’t mean he’s stupid, Jess literally flunked out of high school and worked at Wal-Mart. Some arguments that I see are ridiculous and hypocritical.
Like when people complain about how Dean “publicly humiliated” Rory by yelling at her during the 24hr dance. But you do remember why he lashed out, right? She literally cheated on him! But if the roles were reversed and Dean cheated on Rory, then it would’ve been acceptable for Rory to lash out, right? I think the stigma against Dean should be abolished because they were just 16 when they got together, and he was perfect for her in every way.
Just like the creator Amy Sherman-Palladino stated, and Lorelai in many scenes, Dean was the perfect first boyfriend.