When I started my application to study abroad in Italy, the first thing I noticed was my obligation to live with a host family. I immediately panicked and hoped there was a way out of it. How would I make friends if I wasn’t living with people my own age?! Since I found out it would’ve been difficult to petition for a different program based on that reason, I talked to other people who experienced living with host families. Luckily, the general consensus was they loved it! I followed through with my decision and completed my study abroad application. By that time I had the advantage of knowing who my host family was thanks to a friend’s recommendation.
August 31st finally came and I still spent the whole flight freaking out if whether or not this was the right decision. Could I really make it four months without going home or seeing family? It already felt like everyone else had friends except for me. But once I met my host mom, my mood immediately changed. She was so sweet and genuinely made me feel at home. I knew that everything else would fall into place.
It was really daunting coming here and not knowing anyone, and even though I was meeting this woman whom I only knew through a Facebook profile picture, I was instantly more comfortable about living here. I don’t think I’ll ever forget the dinner she made the first night. Her food is absolutely amazing; there has not been one meal I’ve been disappointed in. (Sorry mom, but you definitely have some competition.) And just speaking to her and seeing how interested she was in my life instantly made me more comfortable and excited to be here, instead of the nerves I experienced before.
Things continued just like that. I kept telling my parents how lucky I was to have Marina as my host mom. On my second day here, I already had a sore throat and when I asked if she had any cough drops, she specifically went out and bought some for me. Call me a baby, but in a new country where I knew no one, knowing that someone was there to care for me was a huge comfort.
I do have the advantage of knowing how to speak Italian and I think that has definitely helped us get along easier. But it’s also one of the reasons that I like living with a host family so much. I know that if I were to live in an apartment, I wouldn’t have much of a reason to speak the language. That was one of my priorities coming here and I’m really glad that it’s proven to be successful.
I agree that there are still some boundaries that I don’t prefer. I personally don’t like that we’re not provided dinner on the weekends we are home. When I’m not traveling, I prefer to stay out of the house so that I don’t feel left out that she’s eating with her kids and I can’t. And it is unfortunate that I can’t have friends over even just for a movie night. But in regards to dinner every night and going out, she (and most other host families) are super flexible about that. They understand that some nights we won’t be at dinner, as long as we tell them in advance, and half the time they encourage us to go out. Marina’s always asking me what I’m doing after dinner or where I’m going for the weekend and I feel no shame in telling her the truth.
I know I got lucky. Not everyone is meant to live with a host family and to be honest, not everyone’s host families are as awesome as mine! But for me, it’s been one of the most rewarding parts of this experience. Sometimes we talk about her visiting New York and I really hope she does so that I can return the favor of hospitality. If I had the choice to do this semester again, I would still choose to live with a host family.