Content Warning: This article contains mentions of domestic violence.
October is a month when the fall weather starts to kick in, scary movies are in all of the theaters, and Halloween caps off the festivities with a night of candy and friends. The month also highlights a cause that haunts the halls of homes and tears relationships apart: domestic violence. October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, a cause that means so much to me and many others.
1 in 4 women are victims of physical violence.
1 in 7 men are victims of physical violence.
Women between the ages of 16 and 24 are most likely to be victims of intimate partner violence.
Domestic violence happens all around us in ways that are seen or unseen. It’s so important to our communities that we educate ourselves on what this abuse looks like, how to respond, and how to help those around us who don’t have a safe place to be heard.
In high school, I saw one of my friends struggle to receive help when she experienced dating violence. From this experience, I decided to educate myself by joining a Teens Against Dating Violence (TADV) board, where I learned just how many signs of domestic violence can be overlooked or ignored. That’s why, this Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I want to share my knowledge about signs of domestic violence. Without widespread education, this cause could disappear behind the background of fall activities and become unknown to those who need it the most.
One of the most important resources that I learned about as a TADV board member was the power wheel — a wheel that shows what abuse can actually look like, not just keywords or phrases. Calling someone names or purposefully humiliating them wasn’t the first thing that I thought of as a sign of abuse in a relationship, but this wheel highlights how that can be just one aspect of emotional abuse. Combined with other parts on the wheel, it’s clear just how damaging this behavior can be for someone to go through, and it’s important for us to be able to identify these signs within our own relationships and those around us.
One of the hardest parts of surviving as a domestic violence victim is leaving the abuser. On average, it takes a victim seven tries to leave. Because of how abusers intimidate and tear down their partners, it can seem impossible to leave at the moment as it can feel like there’s no one to help them and listen to their feelings. Having a safe space to talk and be heard is vital for domestic violence victims and can help them feel empowered to leave. That’s why, to me, it takes an entire culture of listeners who know not only what domestic violence is but how to help victims leave their situation and recover.
Kristen Hoskinson, a board member of Partnership Against Domestic Violence, shared with HCFSU what she believes will be most impactful for Domestic Violence Awareness Month and the cause as a whole. She stated that “one of the best weapons that we have to combat domestic violence is to have education awareness and a space to talk.” That education can make all the difference for a victim of domestic violence.
Although leaving an abusive situation is challenging, no one is alone. Choosing to be aware of this behavior, what it can look like, and where to go for help will make our spaces safer, whether they’re on a college campus or in a house down the street. Education and awareness can make one in none a reality for all of us, and this October, we should all learn more about this cause and our role in the fight against domestic violence.
Until 1 in 4 becomes 1 in none.
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, call 911 or the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1(800) 799-SAFE (7233) or visit thehotline.org
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