We’ve all been there. Countless hours dedicated to swiping on Chads and Brads. Photoshopped pictures that lie about age and height. A never-ending circle of the “talking” phase whilst never meeting up with them in person. Online dating in today’s world seems to be one of the most exciting but painstakingly frustrating forms of finding a significant other.
While I do enjoy the endless hours of swiping on Tinder or Bumble for that extra ounce of attention (Who doesn’t?), I long for the day when someone who genuinely wants more than a booty call or friends with benefits—a relationship. In my opinion, the world of dating has lowered its standards immensely while raising its expectations in the world of Photoshop and Snapchat.
And don’t get me wrong, girls and boys do it. The skinny waists, tanned skin, six-pack, toned muscles and seemingly pore-free faces flood the dating platforms of Tinder, Bumble and Hinge. But what is most appalling to me is that the talking stage and dating stage have now been warped into one virtual experience that is almost completely through Snapchat or Instagram, leaving the possibility of getting ghosted more probable than a real in-person date. The “What’s your number?” or “Can I call you?” questions are now replaced with “Yo, what’s your snap?” or “Lemme see a pic.”
Women are objectified continually, lowering their confidence and mental health while men are looked down upon for femininity or showing emotion. This creates a domino effect of women getting trust issues and men posting the manliest activities they can find on their profile to feel attractive enough to us. Ah, and this brings me to the most iconic profile picture of all time—the fish photo.
No offense to this guy, but what is with the fish photos? I fully believe the men in the dating pool around me have no personality trait other than holding a dead animal on a string or posting a shirtless, sweaty picture from the gym in hilariously tiny shorts. People are so fixated on their appearances nowadays that they have completely forgotten what a relationship or even potential admirer looks for, like having a college education or simply sharing common hobbies or interests.
Lastly, these modernized dating apps have completely erased the idea of “dating to marry” or merely, dating at all. Growing up in high school, boys and girls would pair up like socks. However, coming to college was a culture shock for me, as the word “dating” wasn’t even a common term used. Instead, “chilling,” “hanging out” or even calling themselves a “thing” became the norm. Even when talking to my older brother about his experience, he said his college days were full of people avoiding the word “dating” like the plague, afraid of the word and what it might mean for them.
In the end, all I ask is that dating apps up their game in the creative department and delve a little bit deeper into matching single people. While they have come far with match-making formulas, they are only dipping their toes in the shallow end of the pool. I say it is time to cannonball into the deep end and really get to know one another on more than just looks and likes.
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