An apology: something that has lost its meaning over the years because people, including me, apologize for things out of their control. The dictionary defines “sorry” as a “feeling or expressing sympathy, pity, or regret.” How do I feel regretful for something I didn’t do? Why should I apologize to someone I pity? These are questions I keep asking myself when I say sorry.
I apologize when someone, usually a male, bumps into me, even though I have nothing to be sorry for. That’s what started this: some man on campus, who was walking in the middle of the sidewalk, didn’t move over when I was walking by and we bumped into each other. I apologized and the second the words were out of my mouth, I regretted them. I was not going to walk in the dirt because he refused to move over; I wasn’t going to apologize for not doing anything wrong. So, I said, “Actually, no, I’m not.” He didn’t even turn around when he said, “Okay,” and shook his head. Yes, it is that easy!
I also apologize when I can’t make an event because of something out of my control, like a sickness. Or when something happens to a friend of mine and I apologize even though it was something I had absolutely no control over. People need to stop apologizing for every little thing that happens in their life. I’ve started the motion to stop saying sorry because something happens. Saying sorry is like taking the blame for everything, and I’ve decided to free myself of that burden.
I know I talk a big game about not saying sorry, but it’s really hard. To make it sink into my brain more, I’ve made it so my phone changes “I’m sorry” to “thank you” when I text. Every time it changes, I rethink the situation and realize that I’m apologizing to my friend about something her boss did. Don’t get me wrong – I’m still sympathetic, but I’m not apologizing for something I didn’t do. I just tell her that it sucks, and I hope something good comes out of it.
One thing I am trying to say now is “Thank you for understanding,” when I can’t attend things or plans change, because, again, they’re out of my control, or “Maybe it will turn around,” when something unexpected and not good happens to someone else. If you need some more examples, the Bored Panda, an online blog, has some great ones!
Courtesy: Bored Panda
So many other people and companies have talked about why people, like you and me, should stop saying sorry. Here’s a short list of reasons why from Little Things:
- You probably didn’t do anything wrong.
- You look weak.
- You seem guilty, whether or not you did something.
- It’s annoying for people who hear it all the time.
- You might be setting the example that you are always doing something wrong.
Apologizing is something that men and women have done for centuries, but just recently over-saying it has become a problem. Save your “sorry”s and use your “thank you”s! It will make you and the people around you much happier. The world is changing at a rapid pace, so I am going to start changing with it.