I work at an assisted living community in Tallahassee, and it honestly has been one of the greatest learning experiences of my life. Some people who know me have asked, “Isn’t that sad?” Yeah, of course, death is scary, but I think the thing I realized early on was it was never about dreading the end but appreciating all the in-between. I get the opportunity to talk with people who have had fantastic and exciting yet very different lives. They all seem to settle back to a place they consider home.Â
Phyllis E. was happy to sit down with me to discuss her life and share some of her advice to people in their early 20’s. She is a Florida native, born in Quincy, Florida and attended Quincy High School. She then went on to Huntington College, before moving and continuing her degree at the University of Georgia. From there, she worked as a data processor coordinator for 25 years before retiring. She has one son, two grandkids and two fur-babies. Phyllis spends most of her time now drinking rosĂ© at happy hour with her friends or dominating bocce ball on the courtyard. She has grown to be one of my absolute favorite people and someone I consider an extra grandparent.Â
It was important for me to make the most out of the time I have with everyone, but especially the people I have connections with at my community because they are like human libraries. If you don’t take advantage of the free advice and knowledge, it would be a real shame, because most of these people want to share their stories. And their stories deserve to be told.
Her Campus (HC): What advice would you tell your younger self?
Phyllis E. (PE): Patience is something I wish I gave myself more of. I got married, had a child and got divorced by the time I was thirty. Luckily, I had my parents support, but it wasn’t easy being a single mom. There is all the time in the world to start a family. But school and career are more important than that.
HC: Do you still keep in contact with your friends from college?Â
PE: Yeah, I try anyway. The real friends will be in and out of your life, but you know it’s true when you talk to them and nothing has changed. I wouldn’t worry so much about keeping all of them. Life happens, people become busy. Sometimes it has nothing to do with the friendship, but the timing. The longest friend I have I met in my sophomore year of college and I spoke with her last week.
HC: Do you regret anything?
PE: I regret getting married so young, but he gave me my son. I didn’t meet the love of my life until I was forty. I knew he was the one from the day that I met him. We were friends first and then I knew I wanted him to be my husband. As far as life goes, I am very content with the way I lived life. I never wanted to live in a big city, I was in one for college and realized that wasn’t the life for me. I went to Hawaii and it was beautiful, I wish I could have traveled more. I built an amazing life for myself and my son, I’m happy.
I vividly remember reading Robert Frost’s poem The Road Less Traveled with my high school literature teacher. She said that the whole point of the poem isn’t to say one way is better than the other, it’s that regardless of it all, it all ends the same way. Richer or poorer, happy or sad, traveled or not, there is no one way to live life.
The main thing I hope you take away from this article is that sure, there might be times where we’ll make some questionable decisions, but regretting them, what good will that do? Be intentional with your choices and try to make some great stories to share. Phyllis is one of the kindest, most confident and most inspiring women that I know, and that all stemmed from her hard work and dedication. It is an honor to share her story and I’m lucky I get to know her.Â
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