*Her Campus FSU does not promote illegal behavior and encourages all students to make smart, healthy decisions. This article does not represent the views of Her Campus FSU.
Welcome to the latest in relationships, sex, love and dating. Introducing, “The Scoop with Szmuc” (Smook) and no, that’s not pronounced schmuck. Every week we’re giving our readers an opportunity to send in their questions to Her Campus FSU staff writer and relationship guru Sharon Szmuc relating to the theme of the week. This week she enlisted the help of Her Campus FSU staff writer Hope Leardini, an expert on long-term committed relationships.Â
Your friends probably assume that this Valentine’s Day you have all your plans figured out since you’ve been dating your boyfriend for three years, but don’t they realize just how hard being with someone for so long can be when Valentine’s Day comes up? Well, we are here to help because spicing up your relationship isn’t always easy but it’s doable (just like your boyfriend).
Jaclyn H.,* 20
My boyfriend and I have been together since we were 16 so we’ve never experienced literally anything else or anyone else, but we’re SO happy together and still in that obsessed happy stage even after all these years. Why is it so bad that we’ve been together for so long? Why do people find it so strange that we’ve only been with each other and probably only will be with each other? I know others can relate because there’s always THAT high school sweetheart that turns into college sweetheart couple and we know the rest. So why is it such a big deal?!
I would like to start off by saying that finding love and keeping it at an age as young as 16 is unfathomable to most. People think that maybe you are just settling or afraid to venture out or that you’ve become so comfortable that you choose to stay simply out of habit—but you know these are all false assumptions. While it’s definitely rare, especially nowadays with hookup culture and a movement away from serious relationships until later in life, it’s definitely far from impossible that two people could fall in love early on and not come across any good reason to end it. My boyfriend’s parents started dating in high school and have been happily married with three children for over 20 years! You should also see this rarity as an inspiration rather than a strange situation.
Don’t second-guess a good thing unless he or some aspect of your life is giving you a reason to (like your sudden realization for freedom). If you become uninterested in the relationship or the two of you develop into different people and find yourselves incompatible, then you might want to rethink your Facebook official status, but for now, forget the people who look at you like you’re missing out. You actually know the real value of your relationship more than anyone else ever could! You may not get that spontaneous hookup on a Friday night with that random frat guy, but you do have someone to accompany you to IHOP on Sunday morning while you sport a messy bun and UGG boots. I vote IHOP every time (especially since its nice sharing those chocolate chip pancakes with bae, every time).
Abigail G.,* 21
I’ve been dating my boyfriend for over two years now. This is our third Valentine’s Day and at this point we’re basically an old married couple! What should I do to spice it up this V-Day so it’s not just another boring holiday?
Coming from someone who is in the exact same position—I feel you! It can be difficult to break out of your habits and think outside your usual routine. Maybe instead of doing the same-old, same-old, ditch the fancy dinner reservations and plan something different for a change! Buy a cute outfit or put together one that you haven’t worn around him before, just to switch it up, (it doesn’t have to be anything too crazy, you can leave the stilettos in the closet), this way you’ll be feeling confident and pretty hot! Even if he doesn’t notice the outfit (he’s a guy what do you expect?) he will notice you feeling good about yourself, and confidence is one thing that guys definitely like to see regardless of whether he is a new love interest or if you guys are practically married. Get a bottle of wine (or beer—there are after all two types of girls in this world), light a few candles and make a nice dinner at home, then watch a rom-com (or a horror film, maybe you guys are into that sort of thing) before the alcohol has worn off while you guys still think that everything is hilarious.
If you want to keep it local, but also a little more lighthearted go to happy hour in College Town or anywhere really (they don’t call it Tallanasty for nothing.) Chat and have some laughs one-on-one- think back to the “getting to know each other and being obsessed with each other” stage you guys once went through. This definitely helps keep the fire alive and show him that you’re just as into him now as you were then. If you’re tired of the bar scene and you really want to get adventurous, head out of town for the weekend and visit a new locations—maybe Panama City or even Thomasville, Georgia. Spend a day or two, or even just the night, at a cheap place by the beach (the cold beach breeze and a comfy blanket makes for a cute cuddle sesh). Bring a blanket, some food, sit and watch the waves or get in touch with your inner Bear Grylls and hike some trails and show him how it’s done. Think outside the box regardless of where you end up – it’ll be fun since you’ll be with your S.O.
–Hope Leardini
For next week’s theme, First Dates, Sharon will be answering questions on everything you need to know about first dates, what to wear, how to act, where to go, what moves to make and whether the first date will lead to a second date.
Whatever the case may be, submit your questions to hercampusfsu1@gmail.com stating your first name, last name, first initial and age by midnight this Thursday, Feb. 11. If you would like to be published anonymously, we can do that as well. Just ask when you submit! The first three people to submit questions will receive a free beauty product, which may come in handy to seduce the guy you met at Coliseum last weekend! Remember, girls and guys are encouraged to send in questions, so stop swiping right and ask away!
*Names have been changed to protect identity.