Ever since I was little, I’ve been a romantic. Whether it be creating love stories for my Barbie dolls or dreaming up my future fairytale wedding, I loved love in every form it was presented. Naturally, I spent hours in Elementary School designing handmade paper hearts for each of my classmates every February, complete with glitter, lace and doilies!
Valentine’s Day originated as a celebration of the martyr Saint Valentine with feasting in his honor. The saint was prosecuted for his ministry and is rumoured to have performed weddings for Christian soldiers forbidden to marry, as well as supposedly falling in love with his jailor’s daughter. Centuries later, as the popularity of courting rose, Valentine’s Day became a celebration of all things romance, as lovers wooed eachother with flowers, gifts and handwritten notes.
As I am sure anyone else has, I have questioned the significance of the day. Despite my romantic fantasies, it can be hard to see the point in celebrating when one lacks another to celebrate with. However, Valentine’s Day can still be a fun holiday, and I feel that in using it as a day to celebrate self-love or self-acceptance, it is transformed into something all the more empowering and uplifting.
- With some powerful affirmations
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Initially, I found affirmations pretty cheesy. Could repeating a positive statement to myself really help remind me of my worth? After spending some time reading examples and brainstorming, however, I found some that truly resonate with and uplift me. In finding some affirmations that ring with power and self-love, it can put you in the right headset to celebrate your greatness.
- Buying yourself flowers
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Growing up, I was always under the impression that people received bouquets of flowers all the time. I thought for sure when I started dating my suitors would show up at my door wearing a suit with a bundle of blooming roses in hand! Obviously, this is definitely not the case! In using Valentine’s Day as a reason to purchase a nice bouquet of flowers, you not only are giving yourself the appreciation you deserve, but are also investing in something that will light up your dorm or house for days after.
- Dressing up
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One thing that always helps on days when it feels especially hard to accept and love myself for everything I am is to dress in an outfit I feel cute (but comfortable!) in. Coupled with trying out a new makeup look, it’s hard not to fall in love with yourself!
- Spa night
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Let’s be real: being single on Valentine’s Day can be a great thing. It gives you the opportunity to focus on appreciating yourself, because those in relationships will certainly not be able to observe the night as a self-care occasion! Slather on a face mask, exfoliate with some sugar scrubs and give yourself a home manicure (make it even easier with press on nails!).
- Writing yourself a love letter
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Personally, I find writing an easier way to express my emotions and thoughts. Plus, in nearly every romance novel I’ve read, love letters seem to be the epitome of romance and love, so if you find yourself lacking a suitor to compose one, why not try writing one for yourself?
- Listening to a great playlist and dancing
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Music has always held a special place in my heart. As soon as I hear a beat, I can’t help but focus in on it, following the melodies and lyrics. Flip on a playlist composed of some of your favorite songs and let loose with whatever dance moves come to you! Feel your strong body move, reminding you of how thankful you are to have it to allow you to dance and sing.
- Ordering your favorite meal
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Since we are still in the midst of a pandemic, it might not be a comfortable option to dine at your favorite restaurant, but takeout is the next best thing! “Wine and dine” yourself in the comfort of your own home by ordering a special dinner.
- Doing some journaling about self love
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As someone who has had a lifelong struggle with my relationship with myself, I know all too well how hard it can be to recognize your worth for all it is. Journaling is something I have found really helpful in changing my mindset and core beliefs. One prompt that is useful on those days where you’re really struggling to see value in yourself is to write a short description or biography about yourself, focusing neither solely on talents or flaws, which always helps bring me closer to reality.
- Buying some fancy chocolates
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Yes, I admit that the idea of sitting alone on Valentine’s day with a box of chocolates you bought for yourself is probably the biggest stereotype of the activities of single adults on Valentine’s Day, but let’s let go of the shame this year surrounding it! Chocolate tastes the same no matter your relationship status, and who is more deserving to enjoy it than yourself? 2020 was a rollercoaster of a year, give yourself credit!
- Taking a bubble bath
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Honestly, I often wish I had appreciated the frequent bubble baths I saw as a chore when I was younger. Drawing a bath can be such a relaxing and great treat to yourself, and it will truly show your body how much you love it. To really set the night over the edge, try lighting some scented candles, adding bath salts and turning on a relaxing playlist on Spotify!
While I know it can be easy to shun the upcoming holiday as something contrived solely for the purpose of commercializing off couples and intimacy, being single doesn’t have to mean that you’re left out of the celebrations. Instead, trying some of these ways, or any ideas of your own of celebrating yourself and practicing self-love is a fantastic replacement for the holiday’s stereotypical meaning!