Is there a person who wears ties in your life who you hate? Whether it’s your dad, a dapper lesbian frenemy, Avril Lavigne or even yourself, these sinister gifts are sure to make anyone go “Oh … Wow …” this holiday season. Click fast, because these deals may or may not be around for long!
7) Smiley Face Happy Emoji Mens Neck Tie
I can’t think of anything more unsettling than these bloated, blood-red smiley faces floating in the dark, black void of this tie. On the bright side, apparently its condition is “Most Excellent.”
6) Wembley Mens Tie Red Novelty Holiday Christmas Santa Playing Golf & Tennis
This “charming” “portrait” of Santa playing golf and tennis is a Christmas must. Bonus points if you give this to someone on Christmas day and thereby make them wait eleven months and two weeks before it’s even remotely acceptable to wear again.
5) Renaissance Handmade Funny Golfer Novelty Neck Tie
This tie also appears to feature Santa playing golf, but he’s changed into some rather form-fitting jeans. Guaranteed to befuddle!
4) Dockers Khakis Men’s Neck Tie
This one’s funny because it looks like it should be one of those “Magic Eye” things where if you stare into it long enough you can see an image, but instead it’s just ugly and if you stare at it you get sad that it exists.
3) Republican Party – G.O.P. Theme Tie
Are you related to a Republican? I’m sorry! Here’s a fun gift to kickstart that sweet, sweet political discourse at the dinner table this year.
2) Ralph Marlin Shades of Marilyn Monroe Neck Tie
This is the perfect gift to fulfill every living person’s dream of wearing a portion of Marilyn Monroe’s face on their chest: a universal emotion.
1) Decorative Floral Glass Watering Pitcher
Okay, this doesn’t appear to be a tie, technically, but it was in the tie section and at this point nothing can surprise me.
New ugly ties pop up on Ebay by the second. Go forth and shop malevolently!
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