All my life, I’ve searched for unconditional love. As humans, we yearn for love and are meant for relationships. However, having struggled with my self-worth, I often kept my guard up and would not allow myself to be vulnerable to love. Yet, I yearned so badly to be loved without conditions or limits, to not feel lonely anymore.
“This mission is like a boot camp of love,” said my mission trip guide. For the next five days, I would spend my spring break serving the poor in a shantytown in Lima, Peru with 17 of my peers from the Fellowship of Catholic University Students. Our main task was to build a 102-step staircase in the middle of some rocks that led up to houses near the top of the mountain. This staircase would serve as a tremendous help to the locals, as the shantytown is located on a mountain and it is often tedious and dangerous for the locals to hike to and from their homes.
I wasn’t prepared for the emotions I was going to face in the days to come. As we pulled up to the shantytown, our guide asked that we take a moment of silence and observe the environment of the shantytown. There were no paved roads or sidewalks, only unleveled dirt paths full of rocks. Most of the houses were made of plywood and the roofs of corroded steel. A lot of the homes looked like they were half the size of my residence hall single bedroom. I didn’t see any signs of running water and although I saw electrical wires, it didn’t seem like any of the homes had working electricity. The people in the shantytown came from all over Peru in search of opportunity in Lima, some with nothing but the clothes that they wore. However, as these people arrived in Lima, they did not find the jobs they were hoping for and were left unemployed. It saddened me to see people live in conditions like this.
Once we reached our worksite, the locals whom we were going to work alongside with greeted us. They hugged and kissed us all, acknowledging us with smiles and warm welcomes. The kindness of the locals touched my heart. I had never met these people before, but they treated me as if they had known me for years.
Shortly after, we began working. We still had a ways to hike before reaching our worksite. As we hiked up the mountain, we brought with us the cement, sand, and water we were going to use to make the staircase. However, I soon realized that I wasn’t physically prepared for this work. I was frequently gasping for air, using my inhaler to help me breathe. At the end of the day, my body was sore, I was covered in wet cement and sweat, and felt exhausted. I wasn’t sure that I could make it through another day of manual labor.
The next day came around and we were at our worksite at 10:30AM. We were told that we were going to work two more hours than the last day in order to stay on track to finish the staircase. My stomach dropped when I heard that and I panicked internally. I barely made it through the last day, so how was I supposed to make it through this day? The materials we transported up the mountain felt heavier, the hours seemed longer, and I was definitely out of my comfort zone. I experienced many times where I felt like giving up.
However, giving up was not an option. I’m a big believer in everything happens for a reason and that I’m placed where I’m meant to be in life. I knew that at that moment, I was meant to be in Peru working in the shantytown. But for some reason, I didn’t feel that I had the endurance to continue working. So, I prayed for that endurance during my break. I looked out in the distance and asked God for a hint of inspiration because I was feeling weak. Then, it came to me that my sources of inspiration were right in front of me.
It helped to have a great, driven mission group. Whether it was Cody checking up on me when I felt like checking out, Tierney and Janine holding my hand as I was scared to walk across unstable rocks to reach the worksite, or Isabel giving me that extra push to keep working, each person inspired me to keep going strong, even when times were tough. It was beautiful to see 18 strangers come together for a week, learn to work each other, and will the good in one another.
I also found inspiration in the locals. Although there was a language barrier, I felt the outpour of love from them. Whether it was a smile or an attempt to speak English or helping me as I struggled to carry sand up the mountain, each action brought joy to my heart. To add to that, the locals didn’t have work gloves, hiking shoes, and wore their every day clothes, yet they were still working much faster and more efficiently than me. Seeing them strive so hard despite these hurdles was very encouraging and gave me the endurance I needed to keep moving forward.
My most important source of inspiration did not come to me as a firsthand experience, though. As a local pointed out to my friend Conner, there wasn’t much of a difference between English and Spanish. Similarly, there wasn’t much difference between the people on my mission trip and the shantytown locals. Even if we have these language barriers, social class differences, and financial status differences, that didn’t change the fact that we are all brothers and sisters in God. We are all one in the same, living our lives to glorify God’s name.
Going into this mission trip, I had no idea what to expect. Yet, this was one of the most fruitful and eye-opening experiences of my life. I not only got to cross off going on a mission trip, travel out of the country, and immerse myself in another culture off my bucket list, but I also received the unconditional love that I was continuously searching for. All of the people I experienced Peru with saw me at many highs and lows, and still continued to show me support and love. This unconditional love, it felt amazing. My heart was set on fire. I felt like I belonged, that I had a purpose.
Now, it’s my turn to show compassion to those around me and spread the unconditional love I had finally found.
Photos courtesy of Clare Perry