A review of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives
As the intro track states, “Come ye saints and come ye sinners.” Over the past few weeks, people have flocked to Hulu to stream their newest reality series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. Viewers have become captivated by the lives of Taylor Frankie Paul and the other women of “Momtok,” a niche genre of TikTok devoted to showcasing the lives of a group of Mormon women in Utah, the hub for all things Mormon.
Like many, over the course of eight episodes I went from not having any clue what Momtok was to becoming captivated by it. Also, like many, I have thoughts on it. So here is my review of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives.
This review contains spoilers, so turn back now if you want to watch the show spoiler-free.
My favorite part of the show was definitely Layla’s divorce party, where she threw a funeral for her married name and her marriage as a whole. Not only was this a high point for drama in the show, with tensions rising between Whitney and the rest of the group and her leaving the event early, but I also think it was a point of empowerment, particularly for Layla. Like with many religions, Mormonism places a high value on the sanctity of marriage and breaking that vow, reasons aside, can lead to judgment from other members of the church.To not only get divorced, but to celebrate it as a transition into a new chapter, was a great way to take away the religion-imposed shame surrounding divorce and subvert church expectations.
Now, onto my least favorite part of the show. The Vegas arc, where two men of the show get exposed for being more than a little toxic. When the girls are planning a Vegas girls’ trip, Jen’s husband Zac and Taylor’s boyfriend Dakota insist on tagging along. Dakota uses the excuse that Taylor is very late in her pregnancy and can’t fly to Vegas, therefore they have to drive, and Zac uses… his gambling problem as an excuse. If he had a motive besides that and keeping tabs on Jen, it was unclear.
While in Vegas, the girls attend a Chippendales show, which naturally makes Dakota and Zac flip out… for whatever reason, to the point where Zac alludes to wanting to end his marriage to Jen. There is a level of irony to this, considering that it was stated earlier on the show that Jen is the main breadwinner for the family, and even gives Zac funds to fuel his gambling problem. It gets to the point where Jen leaves Vegas early with Zac, and even leaves Momtok entirely to move with Zac to New York. Social media indicates that the two plan on staying together, despite the other wives of Momtok trying their best to convince Jen that she deserves much better – I find myself in agreement.
Jen and her arc on the show raises an interesting question, “How much is ‘too much’ to try and save a marriage?” In many religious communities, Mormonism not being an exception, marriage is seen as a union between two that one is majorly responsible for upholding – that ‘one’ being the wife. If the marriage fails, regardless of the husband’s actions, it will somehow get pinned on the wife for being lacking in some way. It is this patriarchal standard that is perhaps keeping Jen in her marriage to Zac – that, and his controlling nature.
My favorite “wife” would have to be awarded as a tie between Demi and Jessi. Both of these women possessed a self awareness and confidence that I found very satisfying to watch. Neither of them were accepting of the misogyny displayed by the men on the show (*cough* Zac and Dakota *cough*) and the harmful ideals perpetuated by the Mormon church. An honorable second place would go to Mayci who, being a true “girls’ girl” decided to warn Taylor about Dakota’s possible cheating, making it clear that she wasn’t trying to cause drama, but rather look out for her friend.
My least favorite people on the show… are the men. All of them. We barely get to know any of them, and the ones we do get to know… they just aren’t my favorites.
Something I’m interested to see in the show’s second season is if Whitney gets a redemption arc, something reality shows love to do. I’m hesitant to outright call Whitney a villain, considering how reality shows are known for crafting narratives that might not be entirely truthful, but I will be interested to see where she stands with the rest of “Momtok” in the second season, which has yet to be announced, but I feel it’s only necessary. The world deserves to know the fate of Momtok and their 40 oz sodas.