After a weekend of female empowerment and hearing from podcast #queens The Lady Gang at Her Conference 2018, I realized it was time for a purge of my social media. Speaker after speaker talked about the value of deleting the people who made you feel inferior or worse about yourself. Former Glee star, Becca Tobin, says her trick is to never scroll. Instead, she gets online to do what’s necessary to promote her business, because it’s obviously a necessity in our plugged-in society. After posting and answering specific DM’s, she logs off. She doesn’t spend hours mindlessly looking through feeds or scouring social platforms to give her FOMO on what her friends are up to. And she’s happier for it.
If that’s a little too extreme for your style, take fellow Girl Gang podcaster Keltie Knight’s advice: Follow more dog accounts and for the love of god quit following people you relentlessly compare yourself to. Acquaintance from high school you haven’t spoken to in years, yet you constantly compare body sizes to? Delete. Fashion blogger that gives you serious envy instead of motivation? Unfollow. Random person on FB you can’t even remember what you know them from? Unfriend.
If people are already popping in to your mind, they should be the first one’s to unfollow. Read on for more reasons to put yourself first over your digital connections and virtual “friendships.”
1. You Feel Like You’re Inferior
There’s a difference between motivation and torturing yourself. Following fitness fanatics and accounts that result in instant negativity about how you perceive yourself are not worth it. Find a balance between motivation and picking yourself apart because you don’t match what you’re seeing on your screen. Instead, try to follow accounts that promote body positivity and overall wellness. There are also accounts that focus on mental health, empowering women, and promote other content you need in your life more than images of Iinstagram models and their lavish lifestyles.
2. You Mindlessly Scroll
Not only is this mindless scrolling TERRIBLE for your wrist and thumb joint (tendonitis, anyone?), but it’s also not productive. Hit up the explore page for some wanderlust-inducing photos of your dream vacation or new content. Find a new #GirlBoss to follow that reminds you of yourself or the version of yourself you want to be. Triple like the cute images of golden retriever puppies in pajamas. Endlessly laugh at the personalized humor sent to you courtesy of your FBI agent. Via Giphy
2. The FOMO
It’s like a drug. I know logging on and starting to scroll with give me major FOMO on a Saturday night when I don’t have plans, but I can’t stop myself from doing it. Instead of feeling jealous of what everyone else is doing, choose to embrace your Saturday night in. With how busy your week can get, a simple night in shouldn’t be looked at as something negative. Take this time to put down your phone, apply a face mask, make some popcorn and turn on your favorite Netflix show. Life becomes a lot less stressful when you stop worrying about what everyone else is doing and start focusing on what’s best for you and your inner relaxation goddess.
3. You don’t actually care
Let’s take a moment to be honest with ourselves. Are you looking up your old high school rivals account because you care or because you want to see if you’re succeeding at life more than her? Chances are you don’t actually care. That person you added because they were in your class? It doesn’t mean you don’t think they’re a good person, but are you actually invested in their lives enough that you care to see the pictures of their spinach frittata? These accounts are likely adding nothing of value to your life. Spend more time focusing on your own life and goals rather than faking interest in other peoples. Care more about your well-being and your future. Soon you’ll be so busy hustling and living your best life you wont give a second thought about what new color Tina is dyeing her hair every other week.
Via Giphy
4. You stopped having real life adventures
When was the last time you gathered all your girls and had a fun adventure? Instead of looking at what other people are doing, make plans of your own! It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant like a trip to the Caymans, which is unfortunately not super realistic for most of us. Just grabbing coffee with a friend, putting down the phone and having a genuine conversation where you’re both in the moment is a feeling that’ll satisfy your soul more than any amount of likes. There’s also ways to have fun adventures of your own without spending a ton of money. Have a picnic at a park, express your creativity at a wine and paint bar, or stay in and watch Netflix with yummy snacks! As soon as you start focusing on your own joy and living your best life, you’ll instantly start feeling more fulfilled.
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5. Evaluating your friendships
Use this Instagram purge as a way to evaluate your real life friendships and what they do for you. Are your real life friendship benefiting you? Are they providing you with a sense of happiness and fulfillment? If you have strong in-person friendships, there is no reason to be seeking validation from likes and follows. Instead of placing so much emphasis on your online status or image, focus on the value of the people who are actually there for you in the present. Start focusing on cultivating these in-person friendships instead of overestimating the worth of your screen. Make sure you’re checking on your friend’s mental health, as well as taking time to evaluate your own.
Via Giphy
And don’t forget to follow more dog accounts, Collegiettes. The more, the better.