Although I have never had my life work out such that Valentine’s Day and me having a significant other fall at the same time, I have never resented the holiday. In fact, I love it. Look forward to it even. (I know, shocker.) I think this is in large part due to the fact that growing up, my mom made Valentine’s Day a day to celebrate all types of love. She always got us candy (which was extremely special in my household where a “special treat” was considered carrots and ranch dressing) and little trinkets, like a heart necklace or a pink keychain. Though it was required of us to bring in valentines for our entire class, my mom went hard. We would spend a whole afternoon at the craft store picking out what kinds of themes I would want for my cards. Every night of the week leading up to that day our dining room table became an arts and crafts studio. My mom, sister, and I bonded as we discussed how we should decorate and what we should write on each person’s card.
But as I grew up I began to observe the negative connotation this holiday has for so many people. So many girls I knew began to dread the holiday’s arrival in February, and I began to wonder whether I should too. But the thing is, that’s ridiculous. As women especially, we are told that somehow we cannot appreciate love on this day without a significant other by our side to buy us jewelry and chocolate and a romantic dinner. We are told that we are not able to experience the beauty of Valentine’s Day without some kind of dream guy who is supposed to sweep us off our feet on this day, showering us with romantic love. But that is completely bogus, as is proven by that eight-year-old I once was who became wide-eyed and giddy at the mention of Valentine’s Day festivities. Of course I didn’t have any sort of romantic love in my life at the time, but I had an overwhelming presence of love from countless other sources.
One amazing trend that has sprung up within that past few years is the celebration of “Galentine’s Day.” However, there are still so many people who lament a night with friends on this day because they feel they are missing out on “the real thing.” My response is to this is: JUST NO!! There is no “most real” kind of love! And when you put the enthusiasm into this day you would into what most would consider a “real” Valentine’s Day, you’ll find it to be pretty freaking magical.
As a long-time platonic Valentine’s Day enthusiast I would like to think I’ve been a bit hipster about celebrating Galentine’s Day (I did it way before it was mainstream). I remember my junior year of high school a couple of my friends and I who were all single decided to treat each other to little cards and a dinner in celebration of our friendship love. There was a major blizzard that day, and having just gotten my license a couple months ago, I managed get my car very stuck in the middle of the street. I remember the sheer panic we all felt, stuck in the ice and snow in the middle of a major road. We followed our first instinct and literally screamed, “Help us!!!” out the window. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a couple people emerged and literally pushed my car out of the block of ice it was stuck in. I kid you not as soon as we turned around to say thank you they shouted, “Happy Valentine’s Day!” and disappeared back into the grey and white abyss of a night it was.
My friends are I still talk about this moment as the most magical thing that we’ve ever experienced. Later that night, once we had dried off and warmed up we spent the night in my room, chatting through all hours of the night. We exchanged cards that I still have pinned to my bulletin board at home with words so honest and heartfelt that I felt and continue to feel the overwhelming love of that night. I remember we posted a picture of our group on Facebook with our cards and throughout that entire week of school I had people come up to me and tell me how nice it was that we did that for each other. So many random people who I would have never expected to say anything made sure to let me know it was “the cutest thing ever.”
I always knew I had been lucky to have such strong and supportive female friends, but this served as the ultimate reminder. No, I wasn’t in any sort of romantic relationship. I had no guy to take me out and tell me I was beautiful and buy me chocolate. But I had a group of incredible people do that for me anyways. And that is what Valentine’s Day is about.
So yes, the holiday is over, so this may seem a bit late in the game. But this should serve as a reminder always that love can and should come in many forms. I encourage you, even if you were so lucky as to spend this day spoiled by your significant other, to reflect on all the other people in your life who are there to love and support you. Valentine’s Day is certainly the perfect time to appreciate those people, but now is as good a time as any. And next year, if you find yourself thinking you’ll be going solo on this day of love, don’t! Grab anyone you care about and let them know by spending the day showering each other in platonic love. (It’s amazing, I promise!!) I don’t think I personally quite realized how lucky I was to have such amazing friends until I saw how uncommon these kinds of gestures can be for others. Relationships are great, don’t get me wrong. But a real, genuine friendship is pretty darn great too and unfortunately can be pretty darn rare as well. So instead of lamenting the fact that you’re missing out on a “real” Valentine’s Day, or even a real shot at love, look around. You may find yourself luckier than you think.