I have a love-hate relationship with social media. We all get sucked in. We want to peer through the metaphorical window to see what’s going on in others’ lives. We want to post photos to share our accomplishments, receive compliments and praise, and quite frankly, we post to show off. I get it. I live in Hawaii, and I enjoy being able to post the occasional beach photos to brag when my friends from Colorado are in 2 feet of snow; and admitting this to the world makes me feel a-lot-a bit like garbage.
But with each post, we’re looking for a like, comment, share, retweet, and so on. For every notification we receive, we get a short-lived dopamine high. And for every post you like, you’re giving the same dopamine high to the poster. Social media has enabled us to compare ourselves to others. It has enabled us to share every little aspect of our lives, be it personal or not. Let’s face it: our generation, and those to come, is addicted to social media. And ultimately, it’s damaging our mental health.
Don’t get me wrong. I love photography and preserving a memory for years to come. I love the concept of this preservation in our fast-paced society. And I understand the desire to share things on social media. Pic or it didn’t happen, right? When we’re excited, it’s human nature to want to share good news. When we’re sad, it’s human nature seek comfort in others. However, some things do not need to be broadcast to the virtual world. Perhaps this is me being humble, or just avoiding being the center of the attention, but it’s okay to keep things to yourself and your immediate friends and family.
As we all know, social media is an easy way to share news quickly. Be it for better or worse. Truth be told, when I get engaged someday, I can’t wait to be able to share the news with all my friends and family—most likely this will be done over social media, because no, I’m not going to individually text and call every family member and every sorority sister I know. However, it is recommended to take some time to enjoy the moment with your SO, your best friend, your mom, etc., and tell those you’re close with before you go spamming Insta with your cute proposal pics and Snapchat with snaps of your new shiny ring.
On the other end of the spectrum, posting some vague Facebook status about listening to sad songs or feeling sad, searching for someone to ask you what’s wrong is so 2009. It’s time to grow up, honey. #10yearschallenge. So please, listen to your sad song, grab a bottle of wine, and use your words. We don’t have the time to interpret your vaguely sad Facebook post.
Even worse, when someone passes away, I understand that you’re grieving—maybe even trying to commemorate his or her life in some convoluted, social media driven way—but please keep it off your newsfeed. The last thing we want is for someone to find out that a loved one has passed away via an Instagram or Facebook post. And if you must share it, please wait a respectable amount of time. Trust me.
Overall, we’re dancing on a fine line between sharing and oversharing. I think we all need to spend a little less time caring about what others post. We need to spend a little less time sharing every aspect of our lives—happy or sad. You’re not an influencer. No one needs to see the meal you prepared. Posting about a loved one who has passed isn’t commemorating them. And vlogging your life via Snapchat isn’t getting any real views—I promise we’re all just tapping through it. We don’t have to know what’s going on every minute of your life.
So, I’m making a (late) new year’s resolution to spend less time online, more time IRL, and so should you.