It is tempting to reinvent oneself at the beginning of a new year—it’s almost like a blank slate onto which we will be able to fit in all those things we didn’t quite manage to accomplish in our previous iteration around the sun.
If there is something I learnt in 2017, it was that filling my schedule with dozens of activities did not make me feel gloriously productive, regardless of how nicely colour-coded my calendar was. The stress and the sheer amount of workload often got the best of me. “Is this what adulting is meant to feel like?”, I would ask myself while stumbling through the weeks and attempting to retain my sanity. I came to the conclusion that no, it is not—at least, it’s not a definition that I am willing to subscribe to anymore.
So, this year I came up with four small and probably underwhelming resolutions to guide me through the next 12 months, and today I’m sharing them with you!
Take time for yourself
We live in a society where bigger is always better, and busier is always more productive. Staying up late working on an essay and having three cups of coffee the next day just to get through lectures is a feat that only the boldest and strongest can manage… right?
Maybe not. Sometimes it’s actually okay not to do everything, or tick everything off a to-do list that was already way too crammed to begin with. It might feel like you’re not being as productive as you should, but let’s face it: it’s hard to be productive anyway when your mind and body are exhausted. So let’s stop before we get to that point, and take a moment to stretch, meditate, or watch that episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race you missed last week.
Just because you have the skills to do something, it doesn’t mean you should
Adding experiences to our CV is invaluable, and a great step towards a future career even while still at university. However, how much are these experiences adding to your life? How much value are they adding to it? Are they bringing you closer to your particular goals, or are they completely misaligned with what you see yourself doing in a few years?
I have found that, by asking myself these questions, I am able to make choices that are better for me and my mental health in the long run. If an opportunity sounds amazing but my heart is not in it, then it will have to be a no from me.
Ask for help and learn to delegate
Asking for help is something that we should not be ashamed of, even if it feels as if others will perceive us as being weaker or inadequate in some way. The next time you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders as you try to accomplish everything on your to-do list, ask a friend or loved one whether they would mind doing something for you—whether it’s washing the dishes or grabbing something from the store. Chances are they will not mind at all, and this will help you feel much more relieved and ready to take on the rest of your work.
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Say “no” more
There is a whole movement, an industry even, around saying “yes”. This is all well and good, and admittedly I probably would not be where I am right now in my life without saying “yes” to things I was terrified about in the first place.
But it is precisely this fear that, in other occasions, led me to saying “yes” to questions that should’ve been answered with a clear, unequivocal “no”. Getting out of one’s comfort zone is extremely important, as long as it serves our greater goals and purposes. Suffering just for the sake of it was never cool.
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