“Friendship is the golden thread that ties the heart of all the world.”
John Evelyn
Friendships are very important for almost everyone, and they come in various ways. For example, a childhood best friend that you randomly met while cycling around in your neighbourhood; a grade school friend you have been hanging out with since you were 7; or a person you randomly met at a club. But friendships, like other types of relationships, can be complicated, especially if they are long distance.
I moved to Finland from my home country 4 years ago and even though I have made some great friends here, I miss my friends from my home country terribly. The more time passes, the more I feel that it is easy to lose touch with many, as the mundane aspects of life get in the way. Still, I have maintained contact with some of my closest friends, mostly by various means of frequent communication.
Not going to lie, the first year was extremely challenging for me. Being in a new country, with no network and away from my support system was scary to say the least. In addition, the transition from seeing someone almost every day to being able to just chat with them through phone or texts was a big adjustment. If you are interested in learning more on how to maintain long distance friendships, keep reading below!
Use the internet to your advantage as much as you can! Luckily, we live in an age in which the internet has made our communication very simple. You can use various social media apps or communication apps to stay in contact with your friends! Secondly, make the effort! Long distance relationships and friendships definitely require effort, but as long as you are flexible and willing, it shouldn’t be too difficult!
Here are some of my suggestions:
- Arrange movie nights! This has been something my friends and I have been doing from the beginning of my move to Finland. We picked a movie and talked to each other either on the phone through WhatsApp or by simply texting. I find that talking on the phone can feel very similar as to being together at the same room.
- Game nights. There are several apps that allow multiple players to engage in a game, or you can even use PlayStation like I do!
- Schedule a virtual get together where you can simply chat and sip some coffee together.
- Find shared interests or continue them even if you’re apart. For example, my friend and I are into roller skating but unfortunately, we both started while being apart and due to Covid we haven’t met at all to skate together! Although we are both pretty bummed out about this, we usually try to practice the same stuff and sometimes on the same days; then we have a chat about how it went while sharing videos we took of ourselves.
- Create playlists for each other or together! This is a fun way to catch up with the music you have been listening to.
- Pick books to read at the same time! This can work like a book club where at the end you can discuss your thoughts and opinions on the book.
- Send physical letters. I don’t know about you, but as a kid I had many pen pals and it was always super fun and exciting to receive a letter from them! You can also send small gifts to each other with the letters!
These are just a few examples of the things you can do, but of course you don’t have to do all the things mentioned above. Talk with your friend and find something that is suitable for the both of you and give it a go!