5 Mindsets I’m Bringing Into 2020

I’ve never been a big believer in New Year’s resolutions. I think the problem with them is that people typically set the bar too high for themselves. However, I do like the idea of having a universal reason to start over and wipe your slate clean (so to speak.) It seems to me like 2019 was a challenging year for many people (solely basing this off of the “2019, you were tough, but…” posts that lingered on my feeds for days (weeks?) after New Years.) I know for me, this rings true.

Something I’m planning on practicing in 2020 to make my life a little better is keeping a solid list of mindsets, or affirmations, that will help me cope when I need some cheering up or encouragement — and I think this is an attainable practice for almost anyone. You’ve heard it before with affirmations: say it enough times to yourself and you’ll start believing it. It’s a scientifically proven fact that this method works. Hopefully, these affirmations will also work for people, like myself, who just want to be more positive and attract better energy into their lives. Without further ado, let’s get into it.

Photo courtesy of Mark Adriane on Unsplash

I am capable of accomplishing anything I want, but not everything is meant for me.

I have always been a go-getter, sometimes to a fault. This tends to make me set unreasonably high expectations for myself, and like anyone, I get upset when I can’t meet those expectations. It could be a rejection from a job or internship, or a failed test that you studied tirelessly for. Regardless, “failing” yourself or not getting something you really want and worked hard for is rough. Something that’s important to remember is that you can be confident, even in the face of failure. Sometimes, rejection is a good thing. That thing you wanted so badly just might not be meant for you at the moment, and that rejection could potentially open you up to other amazing opportunities and experiences.

I am worthy of love and I am capable of loving.

This doesn’t just apply to romantic love, it applies to platonic and familial love as well. If there is a person in your life who is making you feel like you are unworthy of their love, cut them out. That person is not serving you in any positive way, and they’re more than likely depleting your self-confidence. You deserve to have people in your life that make you feel special, and appreciate and love you for who you truly are. You are perfect just the way you are, and someone, whether an S.O., a friend or whoever, will see that too. I promise.

It’s okay to not be happy all the time.

This one is important. Forcing yourself to be happy, even when you’re not, is exhausting (trust me, I have lots of personal experience with this.) If you’re feeling down, talk to someone — a trusted friend, a therapist, whoever. Letting yourself be vulnerable and opening up to others can actually be, in some cases, a beautiful experience, but you have to let yourself be open to it. Nobody is happy all the time, despite what people may try to project on social media. We’re human, and really, it’s pretty unnatural to be happy all the time… so let out a good cry once in a while. It won’t hurt you.

Control what you can, leave everything else behind.

Life has a really funny way of throwing you curveballs when you least expect it, and they usually come at the worst times. Most of the time, we can’t control these sh*tty things that happen to us. (Sorry for the droplet of existential dread.)

Alas, there’s a way to attempt to make these situations better. Bad things are going to keep happening in your life, point blank — but if you accept them and change your reaction, rather than trying to change the situation itself, it might make the bad thing a little more bearable. Is there something to learn from the situation? Can you spin it in a positive way? 

On the flipside, there are some things in life we can control, and by all means, take those things by the wheel and steer in whichever direction you please. As for the things you can’t control, just accept that they’re happening (however bad it may be) and try to change your reaction. 

I will not be afraid to take the first step.

I’ll be the first to admit that it’s hard for me to step out of my comfort zone sometimes, and I know I’m not the only person who relates to that. Think about how much happier you would feel if you had no inhibitions… how much opportunity you could take advantage of, the people and things you would experience. 

Nervous to ask someone out? Just do it. I know, easier said than done, but if you think about the possibilities and outcomes of every decision you’re making for too long, you’ll make the decision after your window of opportunity is closed. Most of the time, I find that once I take that initial step, everything gets easier. So whatever that thing is you’ve been longing to do, just. do. it. Seriously. And if doesn’t work out, oh well — you had the courage to try, and better things will come your way. 

Photo courtesy of Danielle MacInnes on Unsplash

A good way to keep these affirmations handy is to keep them in a note on your phone, or even tape them to your bathroom mirror. The more you read them, the more you’ll start to believe them. Hopefully, these put you in a good headspace, and give you a great start to this new decade we’re in.