A year and a half ago, I applied to be a senior leader for a hip hop group at my high school. That rejection, along with countless other seemingly minor events including my situationship, kicked off my decision to pursue med school.
The butterfly effect is the idea that small events can cause major, rippling changes. Its name came from a scientist studying how the same weather patterns drift apart and drastically differ as they move. In essence, the flap of the wings of a butterfly could cause a hurricane on the other side of the world.
My own butterfly effect likely started far before the dance leader rejection, but it is a good place to start. The supervisor of the club called me into the office to tell me the news, something I already thought was strange since the results would simply be posted the next day. Instead, she told me that yes, I was not selected, but there was a leader position open for the entrance group that she would like me to take. There was only one problem: entrance is only for kids in sixth to ninth grade.
At that time, I felt that I had no ability to interact with kids. Even so, I loved the club and wanted to be a senior leader in any capacity, even though I purposefully did not sign up to lead entrance before. The next few months teaching the kids in my group taught me more than all four years of highschool. A whole article could be dedicated to that experience alone, but in my narrative dedicated med school, it is simply a first step.
Fast forward to college. I applied as a computer science major, which I had decided on about two years prior. Originally, I planned to get a bachelor’s degree, work for around ten years, and then decide if I could manage med school. Within the first month of the semester, I received a job opportunity teaching coding to kids.
You can probably see where this is going. If I had not already had experience teaching, I may not have even submitted an application for this job. Needless to say, I got the job and began working immediately. Unfortunately, my plot armor got me the job, but did not save me from how much I hated it. The kids were wonderful, but the job was too demanding with no breaks and little ability to prepare yourself for the day. That was strike one.
I am finally getting to the point you clicked on this for. I met my situationship around the time I got the job. He was studying computer science too, but was slightly older. His knowledge and talent inspired me, but it also scared me. He explained how hard it was to get an internship even with all of the skill and experience he had. He constantly tried to get me to switch my major because he regretted getting so far into a degree where the opportunities kept drying up. He never managed to properly convince me, but strike two.
If anyone reading this has ever broken up with their situationship, you know the amount of effort it takes to keep them off your mind. On top of that, even my regular tasks like homework started feeling insane to me. I eventually put all of that bottled up energy towards properly considering my career choices for the first time in over two years. I began researching artificial intelligence and the impact it would have on computer science related jobs in the near future. The results were grim. Strike three.
I explored almost every major before genuinely considering my original goal of becoming a doctor. I felt that I still held that fear from highschool of the amount of schooling it would take, but now, giving myself the time to genuinely consider my goals, I found that the schooling no longer scared me. Once I sat down and truly reconsidered the way my personality and experiences completely changed, I was able to let go of my pride and my past self, and make a change that makes me feel optimistic for the future.
I have no idea where this path will take me, but I have already begun working on clinical hours and studying, so I feel confident for now. Over this entire saga, I have made far more mistakes than good decisions, but by far the most important decision I made was to take any opportunity and try new things. Even a stressful job or painful situationship leaves room for learning and self discovery that would have been otherwise inaccessible.
If you told me in September that I would be aiming for med school by April, I would not have believed it. The butterfly effect worked its magic to change my path, and I am sure that a small decision I make right now will lead to a greater effect in the future once again. I cannot wait to see where it takes me!