A Memoir on Love, Friendships, and Publishing: An Interview With Alissa Derogatis

(Alissa Derogatis currently resides in North Carolina, where Hurricane Helene has taken the lives of hundreds of people and wiped homes of numerous families. According to the WFAA channel, this storm is the “deadliest since Katrina”. In order to help local families in surrounding areas please donate to the Red Cross. Furthermore you can visit NBC News, to find more information regarding donating.)

This week, I had the opportunity to speak with Alissa Derogatis, author of the viral novel Call It What You Want. A HerCampus alumni from UNC Charlotte, Derogatis’ debut novel was a #1 best-seller on Amazon, sold over 50,000 copies, and accumulated over 10 million views on Tiktok. Moreover, it was featured in PEOPLE Magazine, Harper’s Bazaar, STYLE, Brit + Co and The Charlotte Observer. Call It What You Want tells the story of Sloane Hart, an aspiring journalist at UNC, navigating the emotional heartaches of a “situationship.” During our conversation, I asked Derogatis about her self-publishing journey and her advice to young women in college on topics like love, careers, and friendships.

Derogatis’ self-publishing journey began in 2022, when she experienced a “situationship” break-up that left her heartbroken. To deal with the emotional pains of heartbreak, Derogatis wrote in her journal which eventually led her to writing a book loosely based on her own experiences with love. As she began writing, she posted TikToks to share her story and the inspiration for her novel. She sprinkled in snippets of her own dating history and heartaches to share the motivation behind the story, which led to high engagement and support from the BookTok community. Derogatis states, “The month leading up to the release, I posted teasers, which I think that’s what really got people hooked.” Additionally, she expressed how she consistently posted her favorite quotes from the novel to build anticipation for the release. She said, “I think the quotes were the biggest thing because it’s a teaser into what the book was and I love quotes. I love looking on Pinterest and seeing poetry, that’s what helps me when I’m in a breakup. I figured that’s the best way to market my book, because it was meant to be read if you were going through a situationship or a breakup.” 

As a hopeful author in the future, I asked Derogatis about her process of self-publishing. She states that, “Once I had the final draft that I thought was good enough and we had the cover done, I just uploaded it all. But, I chose a specific day to release it so I could build that anticipation. Actually self-publishing a book, especially if you use Amazon (through Kindle Direct Publishing), it’s really seamless. It walks you through the whole process.” Derogatis completed the self-publishing process on her own, without an official editing team or management. However, she had two friends read over the book to offer feedback throughout the writing process. Derogatis explains how she thinks the lack of outside noise helped her make the story more “raw” as it depicted her authentic emotions at the moment of writing it. After the book was published and received attention on social media, Source Books reached out to work with her to republish an officially edited version of the novel. Derogatis is continuing to work with Source Books to release her second novel soon! 

Derogatis’ biggest piece of advice to upcoming authors is to “trust your gut and do it for yourself”. Furthermore, she states, “I still definitely have impostor syndrome, like how I got here. I feel like sometimes I’m not good enough. I just think it’s really easy to get caught up in what everyone else is saying about you and you have to, again, just trust your gut. That’s probably my biggest piece of advice.” Despite the outside noise surrounding the publishing of her novel, Derogatis continued to write about the struggles of heartache for herself. The support of social media, family and friends allowed her to keep writing and successfully publish a #1 best-selling book on Amazon. Derogatis’ self-publishing story is a great testament to the idea that losing something precious could lead to gaining something priceless. 

The novel, Call It What You Want, serves as a sentiment to many obstacles young women face in college such as toxic relationships, post-graduate life, and discovering yourself. I asked Derogatis for advice on how to face hardships such as a “situationship”, finding a career after graduating, and maintaining friendships when moving away. She told me, “Where you end up is going to eventually lead you on the right path and once again, trusting that. I like fate, like I always think everything happens for a reason.” When graduating from college, Derogatis shared her experience with entering careers that she didn’t quite feel was her “dream”. While many students moved back home in her post-graduate years, she moved away from home in hopes to experience a new life surrounded by the inspiration of her dream career. She shared that even though her first job wasn’t her initial aspiration, it taught her a lot and led her to her dream job. She encourages upcoming graduates to trust fate and to keep working towards their dreams. 

Maintaining friendships in post-graduate years can be daunting, especially if a friend moves out-of-state or builds up a tiresome work schedule. “Being supportive is important. Everyone’s lives are going to look different outside of post-grad.”, Derogatis says. In addition to supporting friends, she recounts to times where it was necessary to cut off friendships. She emphasizes, “Going back to that trusting your gut, it’s okay to have fights and maybe some falling outs and wanting to rekindle… But I think it’s also important knowing your worth and knowing when to walk away…. Some people will never support you, never understand you and they’re only going to bring you down.” Derogatis’ value on friendship shines through her novel, especially in the main character’s (Sloane) bestfriends, Jordan, Lauren, and Graham. Lauren and Graham are loosely based on Derogatis’ real life best friends who accompanied her through her own heartbreak at the time of writing this novel. Her heartfelt representation of true friendship, comforts the reader and showcases what real love is. 

The main premise of the novel is a toxic relationship unfolding between senior year college into post-graduate years. Unlike a typical love story, Derogatis wanted to depict a raw relationship ending not-so happily. This unique twist lets readers see the pains of experiencing a “situationship” and that they’re not alone with these feelings. I spoke with Derogatis about her own heartbreak experiences in college and what advice she may offer to those currently struggling. She said, “I wish I worked on my social life a little bit more… so I do think college is for finding yourself, finding your career, finding your friends, and if a boy comes along great.” 

Throughout early stages of adulthood, whether it’s for first year on campus or final, obstacles are thrown at you constantly. I asked Derogatis about how she managed obstacles such as breakups, friendships ending, and family issues throughout college. “I would just say knowing that it’s going to be okay. What you think is the worst isn’t actually the worst, like think back to when we were in high school and you would get grounded and miss a party, and now you don’t even think about it. You’re going to get through it and it’s all going to make sense eventually.” 

In addition to majoring in Communications with a minor in Journalism, Derogatis worked in her school’s chapter of HerCampus. She recounts her experience and says, “I wrote an article that ended up going viral for the “Odyssey” and HerCampus reached out to me to ask if I wanted to start the chapter for my school. So I did. I was the chapter director and I basically forced all my friends to join and write articles because I didn’t know how to recruit people at the time. But, I loved it and I think it shapes who I create Sloane into because that’s her job outside of college. And I’ve always had this dream of writing for Cosmo or Bustle or Elite Daily, that’s what I wanted to do with my life when I graduated… it was really fun!”. Derogatis participated in HerCampus her junior and senior year contributing by writing pieces such as “The Story of a Young Sepsis Survivor” and “9 Times We All Wanted to Punch Krystal From ‘The Bachelor’ In The Face”! She continues to write fun articles on her personal blog, Probably Oversharing, on Substack. Even though I am a freshman in college, most themes in the Call It What You Want don’t apply to me yet… It definitely taught me a lot about the trials young women face during these “adulting” years. Alissa Derogatis’ novel presents a raw depiction of the disappointment and sadness yet the curiosity, excitement and love you experience during these confusing times. While the ending wasn’t fully what you expected, it leaves you satisfied with Sloane’s growth into a new person.

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