Etiquette in the Pink Pony Club: Chappell Roan’s Fight Against Parasocial Relationships

You and I both have likely found ourselves scrolling through social media at any point in the day, seeing faces blurring past our fingers showcasing their lives—from their talents to their most personal problems. For a moment it’s as if they are an old friend and we are catching up. We laugh together, we celebrate their achievements: all while holding them in the palm of our hands. 

These old friends of ours may not know who we are, but we feel like we know who they are. After all, we see their lives in front of us. The parasocial relationships that people have formed with celebrities have become more than just a passing admiration; they have surpassed the lines between fan and friend, and progressed into a more blurred web of complex interactions over the years. In most cases, those affected by the repercussions of parasocial relationships have politely accepted this as flattery, others have spoken out and been met with mixed reviews. 

So that begs the question: What happens when the lines between admiration and intimacy blur? And more importantly, what happens when the artists affected by these often one-sided connections speak out?

American singer and songwriter Kayleigh Rose Amstutz, professionally known as Chapell Roan has made her rise to stardom in recent months as a breakthrough artist with hits like ‘HOT TO GO!’. 

Roan’s recent appearance in the media however, points to something more troubling about the intensity which audiences connect with their favorite celebrities. Last month, Roan took to Tik Tok to voice her concerns about the stalking and harassment she has been facing since her rise to stardom setting a boundary that the kind of behavior she has seen makes her uncomfortable even if it “comes with fame”. Her short two-part Tik-Tok began by posing a hypothetical question which asked followers if they would harass an unknown person in the street. “I don’t care that abuse and harassment—stalking, whatever—is a normal thing to do to people who are famous,” she continued in the second video, “that does not make it okay. Doesn’t mean I like it. I don’t want whatever you think you’re supposed to be entitled to whenever you see a celebrity.” 

The reactions to this were mixed with some fans taking to platforms like X (formerly Twitter), Tik Tok, and Instagram to voice their understanding, while others voiced their disagreement with the artist. The video’s comments have since been disabled yet Roan was asked about the topic by Entertainment Tonight at the 2024 VMA’s where she performed her hit song ‘Good Luck Babe!. Roan stated her contentment with the way that fans have been responding by saying, “I think people really listened, people have been so respectful,” and distinguished between fans and those who have violated her boundaries, “I feel very heard…I think that it’s hard for artists to speak up. We’re not talking about fans. We’re talking about people that are harassing [me]”.

Chappell Roan is navigating a tricky terrain that many other celebrities have tried to manage with little success. Celebrities like Justin Bieber have spoken out in the past about the very issue and been faced with responses from fans such as one user’s: “So you’re saying that you are obsessed with yourself,” and another, “perhaps your fans should stop giving you money altogether as you seem to have little to no respect or time to ask them nicely to respect your wishes.” This occurred nearly 8 years ago, and echoes of it can still be seen today with Chappell Roan’s plea for fans to give her space. This push to set boundaries and be firm on them is an interesting new development which may set a precedent for her fanbase, and potentially many other famous personalities that face this kind of behavior. 

The accessibility that fans have to their favorite artists has exploded with the rise of Stan Culture, and is amplified by social media. As Roan continues to carve out a place in the music industry, she also plays a role in shaping the conversation of what healthy fan-artist relationships look like in the digital age. What remains to be seen is whether the artist’s firm stance on how she wants to interact with fans will set a precedent, or result in the same cycle of parasociality that has persisted in the digital age and beyond.

• Chappell Roan
• entertainment
• parasocial relationships
• pop culture