Yes, at first it is hard – losing someone you whom you cared for, loved and cherished. I have been in your position before, and I have four words to tell you – you will be okay. I know you’re probably thinking that the world is over. You now don’t know what you are going to do with your life and your future now that you are no longer with your significant other. Guess what? You will be okay.
You will remove your significant other (S.O.) from your life in rage. You will throw out and delete pictures. You will return belongings that are rightfully theirs (or possibly throw out/burn them…not speaking from experience). You will erase them from any or all social media networks. That is right, no more Instagram photos, no more Snapchat streaks, no more Tweets, no more Facebook shares and likes. The delete button will be your best friend for the next 48 hours.
You will alert any friends and family that your involvement with your S.O. is done. This will prevent any questions along the following:
“Oh, how are they doing?”
“How long have you two kiddos been together now?”
“When are you guys going to (get engaged/married/have kids)?” (depending on the relationship length or seriousness.)
You don’t want their name mentioned in any way, shape or form because you know it will rip open the fresh wounds you are starting to form about your lost relationship.
You will cry. You are human – it is okay to cry. You may also have some choice words to say, either to their face or to yourself. This is you just letting out the built up frustration and hurt that you’re feeling all at once. Pro tip: Pillows can be used for screaming, crying and punching (if necessary.)
It will take time to heal. (“Time heals all wounds” – Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy). A week, a month, a year – it all depends. Healing is a process, not a race. You will miss your inside jokes, your favorite meals and places to go. You will hear songs that remind you of them. You will look at the calendar and see a date of significance, and it may sting a little. You will think about them at the most random times; it will creep up on you from behind and hit you like a bus.
Even after all of this – you will be okay. You will find funny things on your social media networks to fill all the gaps and voids left on your feeds. You will take bomb empowerment selfies and photos with your friends to upload and replace the photos that held your memories. You will talk to your friends and family about yourself, and all the amazing things you do on a daily basis or while you’re starting this new chapter of your life. You will clear your mind of your feelings towards your former S.O. and replace them with happy thoughts and song lyrics that bring you comfort and joy. Your wounds will heal, and you will be stronger than before.
You will find another person along the line that will bring you more happiness, love and care than they ever could. You will create new inside jokes, make new memories, find new “spots” and have new important days to remember and celebrate.
Most importantly, you will be okay.