On June 29, headlines were not buzzing about Tom Cruise’s performance in the new jukebox musical movie “Rock of Ages,” but rather, Katie Holmes’s statement of her separation from her superstar husband. Five years after a whirlwind romance and fairy tale wedding, the pair is divorcing, with Holmes even filing in New York instead of California, the location of her new apartment separate from Tom.
Jonathan Wolfe, Holmes’ attorney, told People Magazine, “This is a personal and private matter for Katie and her family. Katie’s primary concern remains, as it always has been, her daughter’s best interest.”
This proved true when Holmes asked for sole custody of her and Cruise’s six-year-old daughter, Suri. The pair reached settlements less than two weeks after the announcement of their divorce. Suri will live strictly with her mother, giving Cruise visitation rights.
Holmes’s legal team happily told People, “We thank Tom’s counsel for their professionalism and diligence that helped bring about this speedy resolution.”
Another flame fizzles out in the lights of Hollywood romance, but bloggers and news sources continue to wonder exactly what went wrong in the marriage of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. There was much speculation that scientology played a part in the collapse of the highly publicized relationship.
Cruise’s attorney Bert Fields was appalled by such claims. He was quick to correct such gossip in an interview with E! News.
“The mere suggestion that the Church was involved in any element of the talks and ultimate settlement is categorically false. Anyone suggesting otherwise is just wrong.”
Still, sources close to Holmes tell of how uncomfortable she was with the religion from the start. She kept her opinions to herself for her husband’s benefit, but settlements have painted her as wanting Suri kept in the dark about scientology. The newly single actress went as far as to have Suri monitored by her personal staff on visits with Cruise.
Whether scientology had a hand in the end of the marriage or not; Holmes’s true purpose in the divorce was protecting her daughter. People close to the actress also tell of her wanting escape from Cruise’s “controlling ways.” The pressure was eating her alive.
After the divorce was settled, a source described the newly transformed Holmes to US Weekly.
“Katie just looks relieved. Like she is finally relaxed and calm.”
This particular episode in Hollywood can teach bystanders a lot about maintaining a healthy relationship. At times, the best solution is to simply get out of it.
In Katie’s case, she got lost in the fantasy of dating her long-time dream man. The Frisky cautions against allowing the mind to be clouded by daydreams. Keeping grounded and concentrating on real life can deter this result.
“As uncomfortable as it might be, try to have a conversation about what’s actually going on between you rather than indefinitely staying in a fantasy relationship with him,” The Frisky advises.
Another constant relationship pitfall is allowing the guy to become your entire world. Making time for oneself is just as vital as he is. Also, his approval should not be the only thing that matters.
Be cautious of mistaking controlling behaviors for affectionate advances. Katie Holmes could tell the world all too well how easily it is to fall into that snare.
Mukta Gaikwad of Buzzle highlighted several signs of recognizing a controlling relationship and to make a hasty exit. The controller will often make a point of monitoring all conversation, as well as isolating the other person from friends, family and colleagues.
Holmes’s father speculated that she was hardly on her own or without a member of Tom’s circle.
Either way, the past is behind Holmes as she embarks on the next part of her life, with Cruise returning to the set of his newest film Oblivion. The public will never have complete insight into the pair’s split, but for the moment, both parties are happy.
Hopefully, the public can take away important lessons from this resolution and better their own relationships.