There comes a time in everyone’s life when they aren’t having the best day. So many things have gone wrong in such a short span of time, and you’re left feeling hopeless and depressed. When this happens, it’s hard to come out of it easily, especially if you struggle with a mental illness like myself. If this applies to you, then no need to worry, my friend! I’m here to let you in on some of my secret remedies for a cruddy day.
1.) Take a long shower
When I’m feeling down, I always struggle to take care of myself. Usually, I struggle to keep myself feeling clean, physically and emotionally. Taking a shower is the best way to make yourself feel better because your body always feels clean and refreshed. Refreshed body, refreshed mind! A long, drawn-out bath with a bunch of candles and music might be a better alternative, but being in college and in a dorm might hinder that. Either way, keeping yourself clean definitely makes life seem a little better. Add in a face mask to keep your skin feeling soft and free of nastiness!
2.) Stay comfy
This can mean a lot of different things for different people. For me, this means staying in my pajamas/leggings/yoga pants all day with a giant t-shirt on. Sometimes I just ditch pants altogether. For some of you, this might mean getting dressed up and putting on beautifully crafted makeup to have a boost of confidence. Just wear whatever makes you feel the most comfortable, physically and emotionally.
3.) Know your boundaries
I’ve always been the person to put other people’s feelings over my own. I value other people more than I value myself, which is damaging and problematic when it comes to self-care. Sometimes I need to be by myself when I’m not doing so good mentally, and I have to leave my friends alone to do so. My mentally-ill mind feels guilty about leaving them alone, but it’s something I need to do to be better. You deserve to have time alone if you need it. If anyone makes you feel bad for doing what you need to do to be healthy mentally, they are not your friends. If you need to be around friends to be healthy mentally, do that. If you’re not comfortable going out on the town but your friends want to, don’t feel guilty about saying no. You deserve to be comfortable.
4.) Stop the self-hatred comments
Some of the best advice I’ve ever gotten is this from one of my best friends: “if you wouldn’t say it to your friends, don’t say it to yourself.” I’m constantly guilty of this. I’ll drop something in the hallway and say, “oh my god, I’m the worst.” While this can be funny in some instances, it’s just making self-acceptance and self-love scoot further out of reach. It’s the basis of internet culture to be self-deprecating these days, but the truth is that it just hurts you mentally. If you ever find yourself slipping up on this, like if you accidentally say “I hate myself,” add this onto the end of the sentence: “I don’t hate myself, actually.” I find myself doing this all the time. The best way to reinforce something in your mind is to say it out loud and that goes for both positive and negative statements. Don’t reinforce the negative about yourself, because you deserve better.
5.) Connect with nature
Whenever I feel like the world is too much, I go down to the Cuyahoga River in Kent and just sit and watch the water. It’s really grounding to see something in nature because it reminds you that life is so much more than the thoughts in your head. If the river can keep moving no matter what, so can you. Even just sitting outside for a while and feeling the sun on your skin or the cool breeze can level your head, which is why people with nausea need fresh air. No one is 100% sure why this helps, but it absolutely does.
6.) Know what makes you happy
This one is very general, but everyone has something different that makes them happy. For me, what makes me happy is painting, drawing, watching videos on YouTube, watching children’s TV (shoutout to Shrek and Spongebob), taking random Buzzfeed quizzes or just scrolling through memes on Instagram. For some people this could be completely different, so just knowing what you can do to boost your mood is a game-changer.
7.) Skip class (if you absolutely need to!)
For me, this is a big one. There are times when I can’t get out of bed in the morning, and that’s completely normal for people with a mental illness. If you feel like you can not make it through the day or need more sleep, you’re allowed to give yourself that. Along with that, it is your responsibility to make up for the missed material. Get notes from classmates and look up the syllabus to see if you are able to miss the material being talked about that day. Keep track of how many absences you have for each class. I usually let my professor know via email ahead of time that I’m not going to make it to class, and I’m honest about why. Be honest to your professors, because honesty is the best policy. You deserve a mental health day if you need one.
8.) Write in a journal
Journaling can be a nice habit to get into because it can really help with mental health. It gets your thoughts out of your head and onto something else. The same can go for any kind of artistic expression, but sometimes you just need to get the words out. You can keep this journal on something like WordPress, which is your own free online website, or a physical journal. Some people prefer to write in an actual journal, but I like to electronically journal since I can get thoughts out faster by typing. This is great because your thoughts leave your head, but also great because you can look back on these past writings in the future and have a little slice of your life at that moment. I like to make lists of things I’m grateful for or things I love to get me started.
9.) Electronically and physically clean
“Electronic cleaning” is what I like to call going through and deleting photos, unfollowing people Instagramgram, Snapchat or other social media, erasing contacts from ten years ago that are piling up in your phone or ridding of old documents on your computer that you don’t need anymore etc. This usually results in me feeling more productive and better about myself and my day. On the other end, having a physically clean space can also make your mind feel less cluttered. It can help you feel focused, instead of worrying about a messy room, thus leading into more productivity.
10.) Treat yourself
You deserve to have a good day. Do things you wouldn’t normally allow yourself to do, like having an extra cookie at dinner or stay in your pajamas. Always remember that self-care is not selfish, it is necessary for survival. In order to be healthy, you must eat healthy, right? Everyone stresses having a healthy body, but we always miss talking about keeping the mind healthy as well. Both are necessary to have a fulfilling life.
Need more ideas on how to have a good self-care day? Here are a couple more helpful links I’ve dug up just for you:
1.) National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
2.) 51 Self Care Ideas To Kickstart Your Self Care Routine
3.) 45 Simple Self-Care Practices for a Healthy Mind, Body, and Soul
4.) 101 Self-Care Suggestions for When It All Feels Like Too Much