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Photo of a "Love" sign
Photo of a "Love" sign
Rebecca Karlous
Wellness > Sex + Relationships

Love Languages: The Language Everyone Should Know

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Kent State chapter.

Have you ever gotten sad about the love you give not being reciprocated in the way you want? Have you ever felt misunderstood by your partner or vice versa? A key ingredient that could be missing in your relationships if you feel this way is an understanding of love languages. 

Love languages are essentially the ways a person prefers to receive love, and they also indicate the ways in which someone shows/gives love. There are generally five love languages listed, and these are Physical Touch, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Gift-Giving, and Words of Affirmation. Each one covers how a person prefers to be treated in order to feel truly loved and cared for. Knowing which love language you most identify with, as well as the love language of your partner or those close to you, will significantly improve the meaningful relationships in your life. People show love in so many different ways. You may begin to understand that how a person shows their affection could possibly be different than yours and that they may show it just as passionately in another way. Understanding love languages really makes you aware of the efforts and needs of the people close to you. 

To find out your love language, you can take this quiz. Now that you have a little more of an understanding of the importance of love languages, let’s talk about what each of them covers (in no special order).

Physical Touch

Physical touch is pretty self-explanatory. If this is your love language, you need to be touched, held, kissed, cuddled, and given other signs of physical affection to feel the most loved. It’s also important to know that if this is your love language, you may tend to show your love through physical touch as well. Explain this to your partner! Try to hold hands with them in public, ask for hugs whenever you could use them, and tell them how much you adore spontaneous kisses.

Quality Time

Personally, quality time is my love language. Nothing makes me feel happier than having someone’s undivided attention and spending one-on-one time with the person I love. I feel so cared for when someone takes time out of their day to be with me because they genuinely enjoy it. Spending quality time together in your relationship allows you to create special memories doing things that you both enjoy. It also gives you the best opportunity to learn more about your partner and become even closer to them. Easy ways to incorporate this sentimental time into your relationship are going on a romantic dinner, having a great conversation, or doing an activity together that you know makes your partner happy. Something very important to note is that quality time is all about giving someone your full attention, so put that phone away!

Acts of Service

This mantra of this love language is actions speak louder than words. People who receive their love through acts of service adore when their partner does tasks to help them out or performs actions that show how much they care. Easy ways to do acts of service for your partner include cooking dinner for them, helping them clean up their space, running errands for them, and more. Bonus: they’ll be even happier to help you out when you need it too!

Gift-Giving

Christmas and birthdays are practically year-round holidays for the one whose love language is gift-giving. Nothing says “I love you” more than giving them a thoughtful gift of something they have been wanting, especially if it’s out of the blue. Presents are the sweetest compliments and show them just how much you want to make them happy. If gift-giving is your love language and you feel uncomfortable explaining that to your partner, try reassuring them that the gift doesn’t always have to be something expensive. It can be as simple as bringing over a bouquet of flowers, a treat bag of your favorite candies, or buying your coffee before school.

Words of Affirmation

Using your words to express your love is the best way to show it to someone whose love language is Words of Affirmation. Sweet-talking really does give your partner the reassurance they need in your relationship with them. Compliment them whenever you can, say “I love you”, and write them a love letter if you’re feeling extra caring.

Hooray, you’ve read all about the languages of love, and your relationships have been saved! Remember that it’s okay if you don’t fit exactly to one love language. Like I said, everyone shows their love in so many different ways. Now that you know exactly what you need in your relationship, don’t settle for anything less, queen. 

Bella is a Communication Studies major and Advertising minor at Kent State University. She loves acting in front of the camera, journaling about anything and everything, and spending time with her family and friends (especially if ice cream is involved). She hopes to run her own blog one day soon and can be found in your nearest cafe, listening to John Mayer... the usual.