While any prospective student or indecisive underclassman can use Kenyon’s website to browse through the 50+ majors, minors, and concentrations the college offers (note that minors and concentrations are sneakily lumped into that statistic along with majors), I think it’s important to recognize that the website misses a few. Specifically, it leaves out six unofficial Kenyon majors that I think we can all agree would make wonderful additions to the academic program.
1. Smartphone Photography with an Emphasis on Like Maximization
Students in this major make it a personal goal to scope out the perfect Instagram photo each day. On especially gorgeous days at Kenyon, you’ll find them wandering around campus, phone in hand, as they casually take pictures of the beautiful campus scenery.
Required courses include “So You Think You’re Artsy?: How to Take Instagram-Worthy Photos,” “To Filter or Not To Filter,” and, of course, “Get My Good Side: Approved Moments and Buildings to Photograph.”
2. Peirce Lingo and Culture
At least once every couple weeks, Peirce serves meals that I’ve never even heard of, let alone eaten before, but the dishes that are unfamiliar to me are well-known to Peirce Lingo and Culture majors. These students have tried practically everything, and they take great pride in this.
Required courses include “The Definitive Pronunciation of Quinoa and Other Strange Foods,” “What CAN Vegans Eat?” and the all time favorite seminar “Meet the Chefs.”
3. Emailology
Crafting an all-stu email that catches students’ attention and holds their interest long enough for them to read past the opening line seems like an impossible task. But Emailology majors have mastered the necessary techniques to write the perfect emails that everyone clicks on.
Required courses include “The Secret Language of Emojis,” “The Do’s and Don’ts of All-Stu,” and the challenging but informative “Subject Lines They’ll HAVE to Click On.”
4. Olin Science
Though it is often confused with Library Science, this major doesn’t teach you how to become a librarian. Instead, it teaches you everything you need to know about Olin, from how to copy papers on the new printers to where the best study spots are.
Required courses include “Securing the Best Couches for Your Study Session,” “Helpline 101,” and “Research: Pro Tips and Tricks.”
5. Hipsterism
Majors in this discipline may be hipsters themselves or may simply find hipsters entertaining and wish to study them and their social behaviors. For a longer description of what it means to be a hipster, I recommend reading this extremely helpful and surprisingly detailed (seriously, this guy put some effort into this explanation) Urban Dictionary definition.
Required courses include “Exploring the Counterculture: Research Methods,” “Indie-rock History,” and “Thrift Store Economics.”
6. Liberal Artsiness
The ultimate major at a fine liberal arts institution such as our beloved Kenyon College, this academic program requires a great deal of critical thinking, research, and a firm foundation in each of the four disciplines: Humanities, Fine Arts, Social Sciences, and Natural Sciences. I’m not really sure what people do with this major, but I’ve heard that’s one of the first things they cover in the intro class.
Required courses include “The Art of Liberalness,” “How to Get a Job Despite Having Virtually No Hard Skills,” and “The Science of Seeming-More-Knowledgeable-About-a-Topic-Than-You-Actually-Are.”
Kenyon students have a wide variety of interests and talents; however, unless they can find the perfect major that combines these interests and talents with a rigorous academic program, they will never reach their full potential. By adding these unofficial majors, Kenyon will move one step closer to helping its students hone their skills and find ways to connect their personal interests with their career pursuits.
Image credits: Melissa Layton, Giphy.com