This week, we at Her Campus Kenyon tracked down two of Kenyon’s most beloved comedians. Will Quam and Elliot Cromer are the duo you have seen taking Rosse Hall by storm as the openers for like a capella concerts and various other performances. We’re thinking we’ll call them Williot. Or Elliam? Regardless, we think this interview is one of the strangest (and greatest) we’ve ever conducted. It’s a long one, so commit yourself to a study break, kick up your feet, and enjoy!
Name: Will Quam
Age: 22
Year: Senior
Major: Drama with a Music minor
Hometown: St Paul, Minnesota
Campus Involvement: Chamber Singers, Peer Counselor, artistic director of the The Billy Shakes Project, stand-up through Two Drink Minimum, sound design, set design, and acting through KCDC. Sits on benches sometimes, enjoys Peirce, enjoys looking at things from afar. Sits in a chair in the library sometimes.
Name: Elliot Cromer
Age: 20
Year: Junior
Major: Film
Hometown: Yellow Springs, Ohio
Campus Involvement: Beyond Therapy (sketch comedy), Two Drink Minimum Stand-Up Comedy, Head CA of Mather and McBride, theater. I was in some films that were student made. I love to fly kites. I haven’t flown one in over a year..I have a lot of kites at home. But I need to find the perfect stick to fix the one here.
Will: He’s just a boy in search of a twig.
Her Campus Kenyon: The two of you have really broken onto the a capella-opener scene. Does your opener act have a name and will you take it on the road?
Elliot Cromer : Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum Dum Suck Their Thumbs Thumbs. No, I like that, but Will wouldn’t. And I’ve never considered going on the road. If someone asked us, yes.
Will Quam: Maybe we could open for the swim team when they go to championships.
HCK: What’s on your Kenyon Bucket List?
WQ: Walk to the Stone Quarry Chapel; go to the roof of Caples; go in one of those assistant director of housing apartments in Norton or Lewis. Also I want to go to that big fancy house with the candles on Yauger when you drive in from Mt. Vernon!
EC: Do my French homework (sorry, Professor Gariou), have a naked KAC session with only male friends…
WQ: I’ll jump on that bandwagon.
EC: I also want to make my own a capella group called Elliot and His Cromers. Or Cromeo. Hosting another all-campus thing would be cool. Like, try and get as many people down at the Kokosing at one time as possible. A Kokosing party!
HCK: Elliot, describe Will in three words.
EC: Forward. Poignant. Tenacious. No, I retract tenacious. Gentle.
HCK: Will, describe Elliot in three words.
WQ: The most talented noodle I’ve ever met. Swift. Slippery. Sexy.
EC: I think that was more than three, Will…
WQ: You broke the three-word mold when you slipped and slid into this world.
HCK: What’s something the world should know about Will, Elliot?
EC: Well, what can I say, really? I’m just thinking of all these compliments. Will’s a quirk. A lot of people think Will is a really nice, lovey, like gentle soul. Just know that Will goes deeper than that. There are sides of Will you should really look more closely at. He’s a surprising man in the best way possible.
HCK: What’s something the world should know about Elliot, Will?
WQ: So I met Elliot his freshman year, my sophomore year when we were in a play together pretty early in the year, and Elliot was chewing gum. He took his gum out of his mouth, lifted up his shirt, and put the gum his belly button, just for a minute while he did a scene. After the scene was done, he came off stage, took the gum out of his belly button, and popped it back in his mouth.
EC: I knew Will was watching. I like to freak people out.
[pagebreak]
HCK: Will, what will you do when Elliot is abroad next semester?
WQ: I will be really mad.
EC: See?! He’s not just the nice guy, he gets mad too!! He’s broken nine lamps in his house, one for every time I mention Prague.
WQ: I’ll have a lot less goof in my life and be a lot less funny, probably. I’ll still eat Doritos and stuff like that, I’m not going to change my daily routine. But I’ll have to schedule in a daily cry. And everything will definitely be less funny and nice.
EC: He likes Doritos more than I ever thought.
HCK: Who inspires you?
EC: Jim Carrey, Jackie Chan
HCK: So, you like JC initials?
EC: Better add Jimmy Carter.
WQ: Mike Birbiglia, the band Gwar… and Mr. Rogers.
EC: laughs, Sweater Vest!
WQ: They’re cardigans. And have you seen the video where he speaks to Congress about funding PBS?
HCK: If the two of you were stuck together in an elevator with a Kenyon professor, who would you want it to be and why?
WQ: Professor Ben Viccellio and he wouldn’t speak to us.
HCK: You can only listen to 5 songs for the rest of your life. What are they? Why?
WQ: Dvorak’s 9th Symphony
EC: I’m picking a song from the movie Drive: Kavinsky’s Night Call because it inspires me.
WQ: Roses by OutKast.
EC: White Winter Hymnal.
WQ: Ok, last one. We have to agree on this.
EC: Chinese Food! By the Rebecca Black Friday guy! Or….how about Kiss Me Where It Smells Funny?
WQ: Yes, that’s the one.
HCK: Who would play the two of you in a movie about your lives?
WQ: Jim Carrey would play Elliot.
EC: Or Bo Burnham.
EC: Will could be played by that guy who is playing Batman. The one who made Fargo?
WQ: Ben Affleck didn’t make Fargo? …Argo?
WQ: Also Jackie Chan? Or Daniel Day Lewis could play both of us at once.
EC: Yeah, I wouldn’t go see that movie.
HCK: What are your spirit animals?
EC: A Bat(man). Or a deer because my initials “elc” which is a lot like “elk.”
WQ: A Bear.
EC: A Pooh Bear?
WQ: I had a stuffed black bear named Black Bear so I’ve always identified with that. But freshman year someone told me my spirit animal is an adult yellow Labrador.
EC: That was worth mentioning.
HCK: What were your Halloween costumes?
WQ: I was Kevin Spacey. By which I mean I had a space helmet and a nametag and did a lot of explaining.
EC: Unfortunately, I was sick this weekend.
WQ: That’s a lie.
EC: I was in my bed so I guess I was a bed. But, if I hadn’t been sick, I would’ve gone as Raggedy Andy.
HCK: Finish these sentences: I can’t live without…
EC: Pigs
WQ: Spooning
Sean Decatur is…
EC: He could cater anything he wants! And do a damn good job of it!
WQ: Was the best party host! Did he have to get party trained, I wonder?
In five years, I will…
EC: Dye…my hair.
WQ: Be trying not to take myself too seriously.
Halloween is…
EC: Heaven
WQ: Flippy floppy.
HCK: Do you have mantras?
EC: It’s something the Dalai Lama said. “Kindness is my religion and my temple is in my heart.”
WQ: I’ve been thinking this one a lot lately; mine is “always connect.” And then another is from a poem I really liked which is “sit back and smell the skunk.” It’s like saying take in everything of the day, including the crappy stuff.
[Photo Sources: Elliot Cromer and Will Quam]