Humans are a celebratory species; we love to feed, feast and festival. This inherent nature of ours often overlooks cultural difference, which makes us an almost-inclusive species as well. Accordingly, when our parents get a whiff of the romance behind our giggles and gossip, it becomes time for us to introduce, *gulp*, our partners to them. And this goes both ways! There will be an instance where their parents invite us over for a meal, and it is good sense to know these very simple tricks that hopefully help to palliate the process.
- BREATHE
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It really is that simple! Sure, meeting the parents can be a little daunting so reminding yourself to stay grounded is key. There’s a reason you’re at the table, so to try and be someone other than yourself is an extreme disservice. Remember that your partner is a sum of their parents’ parts and if they dig you, the parents probably will too.
- LISTEN
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Don’t force conversation. Instead, let the conversation find you. They know more about your partner so don’t try to assert the little that you do know. Sometimes, a smile goes a long way! Don’t be afraid to express your thoughts without trying to undercut what they’re saying. All in all, pin up your ears and listen and I promise you’ll be left with a newfound love for your partner!
- CONTAIN
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If nothing else, remember this one because it is an absolute game-changer! Learning about your partner’s innocent past and gullible actions may trigger some libido movement in you. However, remind yourself that this day is not about you and your partner alone; aim all your sentiments at dialogue for the best results.
- CONVERSE
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This goes without saying- your partner isn’t the only line of similarity you will find with the folks. Maybe their dad knows a great substitute for butter and/or their mum is in a line of work you happen to be investigating. Chime in, ask questions, give yourself a little credit here. Refrain from arguing though because they’re probably a whole chardonnay wiser than you are. And again, remember that a smile can go a long way!
- FORGET
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Even with all this wisdom, you may just find yourself awkwardly figuring out your way around a fork. That’s okay! You will undoubtedly make some silly mistakes and maybe refer to your partner as ‘zaddy’ out of habit. Laugh it off- the parents are a couple too; they know what’s up. Take back the positives with you without paying much heed to the oversights. Placing emphasis on these mortal slips will only make the next meal harder to ingest.
Meeting the parents is only as big a deal as you make it. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been with your partner for just a few months or a whole decade – it gets easier the more you frequent them. If you don’t feel ready, communicate! If you’re not up for it, it is bound to seep in during the ordeal in the least flattering ways. To be honest though, you’re probably groovier than you think you are and that’s perhaps why you’ve been extended an invitation. In that case, to tame your ego ever so slightly: the parents know that you’re the one doing their child (oops).