Eighteen years, eleven months, and zero romantic partners later, I’m starting to wonder if Cupid has lost my address. While I admit it feels embarrassing, it’s true: I’ve never been in a relationship. The universe seems to have had me on a singles-only guest list for years. And now it’s December, the month of twinkling lights and mistletoe, and the number of couples only seems to be magically multiplying. While everyone around me is starring in their own festive rom-coms and making reels on the same ‘snowman’ trend on Instagram, I’m over here wrapped in a cozy blanket… watching those reels.
I’ll admit it. I am a little jealous. Seeing all the matching outfits, sweet – if slightly cringe – captions, and idyllic couple photos stirs something in me. And to make things worse, the fact that next year will be my last as a teenager also has me spiraling. What if I never experience that classic teenage love story everyone talks about? What if I never manage to experience what I see on my phone screen? What if I never get to post my share of cringe-worthy posts online like my friends do?
That’s when it hit me. I’m not jealous of dating someone, I’m jealous of missing the hype around dating. It’s a classic case of FOMO. I’m not mourning the absence of love in my life, I’m mourning the absence of a narrative – the idea of love that social media has sold me. In today’s world, dating often feels like a social standard to uphold rather than following matters of the heart. It’s bizarre how being in a relationship isn’t just about the person you’re with, it’s about what your relationship looks like. And for those of us without a partner, it’s easy to feel out of step, as though we’re behind in some invisible rat race. But let’s be real – is it really about feelings and love? Or is it about reaching the social media milestones I think I’m supposed to reach? I wonder if my so-called embarrassment about being single has less to do with me and more to do with what society seems to expect of me.
Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to experience a romantic moment or two, to star in my own rom-com. Who wouldn’t? But I’m also realising that my worth isn’t tied to whether or not I can participate in Instagram-worthy trends. There’s so much pressure to date just for the sake of it, but I’d rather wait for something genuine than rush into a relationship just to conform. That said, if casual flings work for you, go for it. Everyone’s journey looks different; there is nothing wrong with taking things at your own pace. It is your own story, after all. There’s no universal timeline or one-size-fits-all for love, and unlike our college assignments, there’s no due date or penalty for being late. We can take our time, savor the journey, and step into relationships whenever it feels right.
Until Cupid decides to update his GPS, I will try to embrace my singlehood. There is a certain joy in skipping the holiday clichés, being wrapped in my cozy blanket, hoarding my snacks for one, and ironically watching Happiest Season on repeat. Besides, being single during cuffing season doesn’t have to mean you’re missing out, it just means you’re savoring some guilt-free me time.
So, if you’re feeling the pressure as well, seek comfort in the fact that you’re not alone. It’s okay to be single; your worth isn’t tied to your relationship status. And who knows? Maybe, as they say, love will find you when you least expect it. In the meantime, feel free to focus on the one person who deserves all your love and attention: you.