Ashley Romero is a freshman from California who is majoring in Civil Engineering at the University of Kansas. When asked for a story from her life, she could think of nothing for almost two weeks, though she took a trip to Hawaii only two years ago, moved halfway across the country to go to college only this year, and presumably lived an entire nineteen years up until this point. And yet, not a single memory from any of those nineteen years crossed her mind. She later mentioned that she thought that most of her stories were only interesting and understandable to those who had been there at the time.
It became necessary for the interviewer to become an investigative journalist to piece together any aspects of Ashley’s life that could be used for a profile. A thorough scroll through her Twitter revealed lots of references to different types of California sportsball. There were also many references to various song lyrics, mostly Drake, but also other rap. Among these were very relatable requests for food – anything from Girl Scout Cookies to churros. The interviewer was getting a better handle on who this Ashley Romero was, but there was still more to find.
Facebook revealed that the most recent events in Ashley’s life seemed to revolve around activities with her service sorority and a group of KU friends. Lots of time spent doing cute poses in front of backgrounds with the names of events on them, and moments spent in community service, making blankets for Project Linus and participating in The Big Event. Farther back in her timeline, though, are moments from birthday parties, softball games, and graduations with family members and friends from California. Perhaps the most shocking were the photos and videos from star-spotting at Disneyland where she saw Kanye West, Kim and Kourtney Kardashian, and Scott Disick with their children.
Partway into this hard-hitting journalistic movement, however, Ashley remembered one of the things that happened in her life and recounted a confusing tale about a family barbeque in which her uncle threw a pair of shoes over his shoulder and they landed directly in a mop bucket that he hadn’t known was right behind him. A lot of information was missing from this initial story, and it was, indeed, a story where “you had to be there.”
It remains unclear why she did not whip out the Kardashians at Disneyland story to blow everyone away with her fancy California life, and perhaps we will never know. Ashley Romero is an enigma, apparently even to herself in that she immediately forgets everything that happens in her life the instant after it happens.
“Let me try my memory bank again.”