Why You NEED to Know Your Love Language

Life is too short, and for that very reason I value telling the people I love just how appreciative and thankful I am for them as often as I can. 

I love writing (omgosh so funny here I am doing it hehe-) and love to write my friends and family random notes, or surprise them with things I know will make their day. 

 

However, for a long time in some of my friendships -all of which I value immensely- I felt like I was being so direct about how appreciative I was with my words and giving so many gifts to remind my friends how much I adore them, and felt like I wasn’t being shown love and gratitude in the same way. 

 

I thought just because they didn’t write me notes or send me sweet texts checking in on me or because they didn’t surprise me with cute little gifts here and there that it meant I wasn’t appreciated or loved in return.

 

 But, wOw could I have not been farther from the truth??

The biggest misconception I could have had was allowing myself to believe this meant there was no love or appreciation for me in the friendship!

 

It later dawned upon me as I read and learned more and more about love languages that -omgosh wAit… We do NOT all show love the same way. AND! The way we show our love is not necessarily always the same way we like to receive it in return. 

 

This is why, regardless of your plans this Valentine’s Day, you will be able to give yourself and the people in your life the greatest gift by taking this quiz, to learn your love language.

 

(P.S. if you google “love language quiz”, several more will pop up, but I’ve used the one linked above several times with several friends and have found it to work well-but feel free to explore others!)

This way you can strengthen the friendships and relationships in your life by knowing exactly how your loved ones like to be shown or told they are loved, and in return your loved ones will be able to tailor to your love language and give you their all as well!

 (so healthy, happy, & essential for everyone!!)

 

Basically, being aware of how the people in your life and yourself like to be shown love and given love will ONLY benefit and strengthen your relationships.

 

Let the happy, healthy, and communicative manners of giving and receiving love begin. (hehehe;)

Whether or not you have taken the quiz *yet* (although total disclaimer I may bug you until you do so ooopsy…hehe), I am going to give you the rundown on the 5 love languages!

 

(Also! The order I am going to present them is in no way a “superior ranking”, as there is no right or wrong way to love or ideal preference to have in showing and receiving love:,). 

So….

In taking the quiz, you will discover your “primary love language” which is most indicative of how you like to be loved/shown love, but it is common to enjoy being shown love in more than one way! Which may include… 

 

• Words of Affirmation

→ This is actually my primary love language, so I am very biased in this being my favorite way to show and receive my love :,). 

Words of affirmation entails using your words to express your love. Whether it be directly through verbal communication, a sweet text, an unexpected note, or a heartfelt handwritten card, this love language values encouragement. 

 

• Quality Time

→ Our time is precious and limited, and thus the most valuable thing we can give one another, which makes perfect sense as to why this is one of our five love languages!! Quality time entails one-on-one activities, conversations, focus, and undivided attention. 

However, it can also entail ceasing any opportunity, even the smallest errands to tag alongside a loved one with, to take advantage of any and all time that can be spent with a loved one.

 

• Acts of Service

*Except envision the gif above reading… I CAN help you because…

→ Acts of service (unlike words of affirmation, which definitely entails more of directly telling someone you love them) is a true testament to some people’s actions serving better to express their love, rather than their words.

 In showing love through acts of service, the individual often enjoys being “the helper” to their loved one(s) aiding in small and big tasks and chores such as running an errand for them, cleaning up, taking out the trash, making breakfast, etc. 

 

We all truly do get by with a little help from our friends :,).

 

• Gift-Giving

→ A perfect example of our own love languages not necessarily being how we may choose to show others we love them is evident for me here. I LOVE to give my friends and family gifts that remind me of them and that I know they will enjoy, although I don’t care for a gift as much as I do for a nice handwritten card myself. Gift-giving tells it like it is, in that these individuals show their love through thoughtful and intentional gifts, or sweet gestures.

 

(Great proof of not needing any occasion to give a loved one a sweet gift!! The present is a gift so every day is now the perfect day.)

 

• Physical Touch

→ Last but certainly not least, we have physical touch. The best way to describe this is as the non-verbal approach to expressing love, through body language. 

But don’t connote physical touch solely with extreme intimacy. Physical touch, more often that not, also entails hugs, hand-holding, and kissing. :,)

 

I personally love and appreciate receiving a good, quality hug. 

Makes me feel all warm & fuzzy- literally, hehe.

All in all, learning your love language and those of your loved ones will only serve you well in your ability to both provide and receive the love you truly deserve. 

The 5 love languages are an important reminder of there being no right or wrong way to love. Van Gogh said it best, “What is done with love, is done well”.

 

• friendships
• love language
• relationships
• valentine's day