Honestly, if there’s one thing I can say to sum up my years as a college student, it’s that you should embrace it, every single moment of it because you’re going to miss it whether you think you will or not. I flew through college as fast as I could, and while I don’t regret that, I do regret all of the things that I could have done in my three short years that I didn’t – and since I don’t want you to make the same mistakes, here are a few pointers for whatever time you have left.
1. Talk to the people around you in class.
My freshman year (which was technically only a semester long), I made friends by talking to people. I had friends who I had sleepovers with while I lived on campus, friends whose doors I knew were always open, and friends that I knew would be open to just grabbing a bite to eat between classes. But there was one friend in particular, a friend that I made just by turning around one day in class and saying hello, who is now one of my closest friends. And in no way do I regret talking to her – but I do regret not talking to more people. There were so many opportunities for me to join groups where I could make friends, and so many opportunities to just talk to the people around me in my classes and become better friends with them. It’s happened with a few of my friends, but not with as many as I wish it had.
So when you see someone that you want to be friends with, just talk to them. Join the groups that interest you, and meet people with shared interests. Don’t seclude yourself from the people around you, because they’re most likely lost and looking for friends, too, especially freshman year, but also long after that.
2. Become friends with your professors.
(If you feel comfortable enough with them, become Facebook friends with your professors.)
As someone going into teaching and who is close to many teachers, I can say that many educators value the relationships they made with their students with the time they had – and this is true with college professors, too. If you get along really well with a professor, start chatting with them after class. Visit their office hours. Have lunch with them on campus. Become their friends. I really only started doing this last semester, and I’m so very glad I did because now I know I have someone who will be willing to read my papers, to grab a cup of coffee when I’m near campus, or will be a smiling face when I show up to their office. (Note: I can’t speak for other subjects, but I’ve found this to be particularly true with English professors, though that really is all that I’ve had throughout my three years. But it’s probably the same for every subject.) They’re professors because they’re passionate about something and passionate about making others care about their subject. And if you’re already passionate about what they’re teaching you, it’s even more exciting. Be their friends, because one day, you may need them.
3. Show up to events
Not to make excuses, but I will say that the main reason I held back when it came to this was transportation, but most college students either live on campus or have the ability to get themselves to campus, so then there are no excuses. But show up to events, to fundraisers, to games, to meetings. Go to things that your friends are holding, their concerts and recitals and meetings they run. Go to events held by your specific college, because they’re set up for you. Open mic nights, poetry slams, movie nights.
Why? Because this is where you meet people, talk to people, learn things about people. And who knows, maybe you’ll learn something about yourself.
4. Keep up with your relationships
I said that I had friends freshman year that I felt close to, but now, a month and a half away from graduation, I talk to only one of those friends on a regular basis. My excuse was that I moved off campus, but when it’s as easy as becoming Facebook friends with somebody or having lunch or dinner with them once a month, then there are no excuses. It’s worthless to make friends in college if you’re not going to keep them. And I mean all your friends, the ones that you want to keep. Because sometimes you can keep friends by only talking to them every once in a while, but many times, if you stop talking to people, then your friendship will fall apart. Don’t let that happen. Send text messages. Write letters. Become Snapchat friends. But keep up with your relationships as well as you can.
5. Take Risks
I really didn’t do this. Like, at all. I went home every weekend when I lived on campus, spent time in my dorm and in the library, and hung out with the, like, five people I felt comfortable with. Do something that scares you. Not necessarily something illegal, but something beyond your comfort zone. Something that makes your adrenaline run. Walk around campus at night. Stay up all night and play games. Go on trips (because the school usually hold them.)
I guess what I’m saying is to be yourself because that’s really what we’re all the best at. Be the person you want to be, and the people that want to be like you will find you. But don’t stay in your shell, in your comfort zone. Go beyond. Do something that you normally wouldn’t do – because that may be how you make the greatest memories and find the greatest friends.