Today is the 48th birthday of Craig. Daniel Craig. Oh and what a mighty specimen he is. James Bond since 2006, wearer of fine suits and deserved Stormtrooper. And if all that doesnât convince you, someone just paid ÂŁ98,500 for the outfit he wore when he dressed up as a skeleton man in Spectre. That is how much someone somewhere appreciates D.C himself. Personally, I feel that we should all follow suit, but in a much less expensive way. Let us take a moment to celebrate his new age, by learning the ways of the infamous Daniel Craig Pout (currently not trademarked):
1.The Lip Ratio.
After extensive research, I can conclude that the average Daniel Craig top lip-bottom lip ratio is around 1:3. In other words, the Daniel Craig pout requires your bottom lip to be three times as deep as your top lip. You can easily achieve this wherever you are by imagining that youâve just watched all the sad scenes of âThe Fox and The Houndâ one after the other.
2. Piercing stare (optional).
You may notice from the large database available (a thorough Google image search of âDaniel Craig poutâ) that the âpiercing stare + poutâ combination is not present in all of the birthday chapâs snaps. Saying that, however, it does provide extra oomph. All you need to do is identify your target and pretend that they have eaten your sandwich but youâre going to be all passive-aggressive about it through the medium of eye contact.
3. Electric blue eyes (see above).
Wherever Daniel Craig is looking, his eyes always appear to be slightly enhanced in the blue department. Create this look with some appropriate fake eye screens (aka coloured contact lenses) or, the cheaper alternative: ask a friend to take lots of photos of you with your perfected pout and use some editing software to achieve that really stunning unnatural look.
4. Minimalist clothing.
Black and white is the safest bet. You do not want to draw any attention away from the pout. If you can get a suit, even better. This is because Daniel likes to wear.
5. Break out of your comfort zone and start modelling, specifically with expensive watches.
This way you can deceivingly convince the people who are paying you lots of money that your power lies in their watch, when it really lies in your pout. Practice makes perfect.
6. Look like you have some serious ass-kicking to do.
Krysten Ritter may be the top dog at this skill. Although, she is not James Bond. Daniel, however, is and does have the advantage of being armed most of the time but I INSIST: do not carry a fake gun around. Daniel is allowed to do this because he is James Bond. You are not. I am sorry I had to tell you in this way. Instead, perform a barrel roll before your pout so your audience knows that you are where the action is.
7. Work on that philtrum.
What is a âphiltrumâ you ask? Well, as we all know, every Daniel Craig-related article is a science lesson and this is no exception:Â the âphiltrumâ is the GROOVE between your nose and your upper lip. As you can see above, Mr Craig here has a rather defined one and it appears to add extra elegance to his pout. I have just terrified myself by searching for âphiltrum exercisesâ on the interwebs (do so at your own risk) but you may be in luck if you know someone who can contour with makeup. Once you find them: 1) Treasure them, they are a magician and 2) ask them to contour your philtrum.
8. Finally, always remember your purpose: to proudly share the Daniel Craig Pout legacy with the world.
Daniel did not use his facial muscles in this way so that you could imitate him with a lousy amount of effort. Follow these steps, practise and only when youâre ready, share your talent. Who knows, maybe you will find a fellow DCP-er and bond over your mutual appreciation of his greatness.
Step aside, Derek Zoolander. Your weak âBlue Steelâ has nothing on the true master of this art: the almighty Daniel Craig.