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Valentine’s boxes are often one of the easiest things you can grab for someone while still feeling like you’ve gotten them something “meaningful”. However, it seems like every year they come out with something that is more strange than the last. This list is what I’ve seen in the stores that have made me question why people would buy something like that for someone they “love”.
One of the weirdest and worst ones that come to mind when I think of the topic is the Lunchable Valentine boxes…. They’re boxes of gummy mock Lunchable meals. Gummy pepperoni pizzas to start, with a jelly-like “sauce”. To me just the sole thought of it makes my stomach turn. They did not only create this; they also made one that represents their cracker stackers. It could simply be my slight dislike of gummy food look-alike candy, but I also just think it is “quirky” for someone’s partner to give them a lunchable heart-shaped Valentine’s box.
Another odd one to me is the Oscar Mayer boxes. The first one I will mention is the heart-shaped boxes that come with their own plushy hot dog attached to the front of the box. I’m not sure if it’s just because as I age I think these boxes become more and more cringey, but adding a stuffed hot dog that has a face is something that I cannot fathom. I feel like getting this is enough that I would get the ick from my partner if they were to give me this. Continuing the Oscar Mayer boxes, they created Valentine’s Kraft Mac & Cheese and Clausse. Hot Dog, Pickel, and Noodle gummy candy valentines, in the boxes that children bring to their classes to give out to their classmates. I know it’s probably something kids would love, but I feel like I would be embarrassed to pass these out to my class. It is something that just doesn’t appeal to me.Now slightly shying away from the ones that are the most odd to me, these are just ones that I am not a fan of, but I can understand the demographic for each. The two boxes are the Spongebob heart box which has gummy Krabby patties. This just is not something I would connect to Valentine’s and feels like it is more only Valentine’s themed because it comes in a heart. I think it should be noted that the box is a velvet Krabby patty-looking box. It’s only giving Valentine’s energy because it is in a heart shape. Next is the Nerf football heart box. It comes with a small Nerf football on the front, and seems to appeal to the girls trying to buy for their middle school football-playing “boyfriend”.