F**kboys are all around; on your campus, living in your dorm, or maybe even on your floor. You may be asking yourself, “what is a F**kboy? And how can I protect myself from their ‘Netflix and chill’ attack before its too late?”
Well, here I am to tell you the signs that he is a F**kboy, so you can protect yourself and your friends and become a vigilante for F**kboys.
1. Excessive Use of Hashtags
Especially including, but not limited to: #420 #blackout #squad #bros #turnt #wasted #whathappenedlastnight. Yes, we all know you and “the squad” were out turning up on a Tuesday, but is it really necessary for there to be 7+ hashtags on your instagram post?
2. Is their outfit more fluorescent than the one you wore for 80’s day during your high school’s spirit week?
If so, you have most definitely spotted the flashiest of F**kboys. They want you to have a physical reaction to their presence. If you have to shield your eyes while looking at him, he is a F**kboy.
3. You Can Smell Him Before You See Him
A classic sign of a F**kboy is based on how pungent their smell is. If you get a massive whiff of Axe body spray (for the more sophisticated it may be Old Spice) that seems to follow you around for the rest of the day, he is a F**kboy.
4. He is Creepily Persistent
This is a tell tale sign of the scary F**kboy. F**kboys just don’t like to take no for an answer. This may be when asking for a dance or to buy you a drink, but the F**kboy won’t leave you alone. No, you aren’t “just trying to be polite and get to know me”, I said “No”. And you are creepy. So go away.
5. He Wears Sunglasses Indoors
This is made even more strange if you’re already in a dark environment, like at a club or at a house party. If you can hardly see yourself and you see a guy wearing sunglasses inside, he is a F**kboy.
6. He is Always Surrounded by a Pack of Bros
The F**kboy is rarely alone, needing the constant reassurance from his buds that the girls who turn him down are just being frigid.
7. They Make it Known EVERY Time They Go to the Gym
The occasional gym selfie is one thing (we have all done it), but the F**kboy takes it one step further, whether they tweet about #gettingswol at the gym or they intsagram a picture of a protein shake, the F**Kboy wants you to know he cares about his image more than you.
8. He “doesn’t want anything serious”
If you find yourself in the position of talking to a boy and he says something like this, RUN. Get gone while you can because nothing good can come of this. Even if the two of you were involved together, he probably doesn’t take it seriously and made that clear in the beginning, making you look like the crazy one.
9. Bucket Hats
Yes, they may be hot on trend, and some guys look hella sexy in them, but half of y’all boys wearing these hats just look like overgrown- man babies. The F**kboy will defend the bucket hat until the day he dies.
Why, just why? Your mother didn’t give birth to you to talk about women like that.
Beware the F**kboy. Those who fall under their spell will tell you time and time again to leave them be. Like a wild animal, they are better to observe in the wild than actually interact with. #TheMoreYouKnow