When you’re new to a school, there are always anxieties and uncertainties. Understanding that these emotions are usually present and unavoidable, as well as shared by others who are in the same situation, can make it just a little more bearable. But starting a new college for the second time brings another wave of butterflies and more complicated questions.
I understand this pain.
If you’re friends with a new transfer, it is important to be able to understand, accept, and empathize with them while they’re adjusting, because you were once new at school, too.
Transferring to a new school held lots of challenges. It can mean a lot of self-doubt and a feeling of defeat. On the other hand, it can spark a wave of excitement, of determination. It is easy to get caught up and confused by these swing of emotions, but know that this is normal, and it just takes a little bit of time to process the new situation and get comfortable in this new phase of our lives. It’s important to explore our feelings when we are experiencing them.
Being able to explore these new emotions at our own leisure is a privilege that we often don’t have, so it is important to give time to those who are learning how to cope. Whether a sophomore or a junior transfer, it is expected of us to handle the stress of a new school, classes, and people with ease and composure. Most of the time, that is just simply not realistic. Being able to take the time to get used to our new surroundings and school like any other first year is all we want – and let’s face it, no matter how old we are, we all love to be babied from time to time.
It’s equally important to note that these feelings may be withdrawal or apprehensiveness. That the initial feeling of giddiness can get overpowered by the realistic and cautious side of the person, and we can become a little detached and unsure in the first few weeks. While this is common and normal, this also means that it can add an extra barrier to creating friendships and connections with other people in that time period. Sometimes, there is an inner battle between wanting to go and make friends, while battling the insecurities of attending a new college, and we are doing our best.
Furthermore, the fact that our peers have been here for two/three years is also daunting. Not only must we catch up with schoolwork and classes, but maneuver our way around and in groups of friends who have known each other for years.
But in general, we just want to relax and enjoy our time at the new school. Since every transfer situation is different, ask our story, get to know us. We want to feel welcomed and we want to be excited to be here, and to know that the decision to transfer was the right one. We want to make friends and have fun, just like any other first-year student. Although we might be older and want to be treated with a little more maturity, we would also love to hear that we picked the right school, and that everything will be alright.