This past year has been quite a whirlwind for most people. Between lockdowns, limited social gatherings, remote schooling, and quarantines, this year has led to changes for quite a lot of people. For me this past year has been all about personal growth.
During lockdown there’s been a lot of downtime, leaving us alone to our thoughts more than we’re used to. Without being surrounded by people all the time, I started focusing solely on how I viewed myself and not on what other people thought about me. I learned to love myself and my body for who and what I am instead of trying to become this image of what I thought I society expected me to be. I’ve become content and comfortable with who I am. I’ve learned that just because I’m a work in progress it doesn’t mean that I’m not worthy. For several years, I’ve lived by the mantra “I am Enough” but it took a global pandemic for me to actually come to a point where I believed that statement.
I also started working out which has been one of the most influential things to help me grow. Working out makes me feel powerful and strong and like I’m in control of my life. Running became a stress reliever where I could quite literally run my problems away. Lifting weights made me feel accountable for myself and only myself. The more weights I lifted, the more powerful I felt mentally (and obviously physically). At this point it’s become an addiction to me because of the boost in mood and sense of detox from everyday life it brings.
Due to the pandemic, having limited contact with everyone makes you realize who is really in your corner at the end of the day. I’m sure we all can relate to certain friendships that have sort of gone radio silent since the pandemic started. Seeing how my friends valued or didn’t value our friendship throughout the pandemic made me realize what kind of people I wanted in my life. I stopped accepting treatment I didn’t deserve and instead focused on the positive relationships. I stepped away from the ones that were hurting me, or the ones who never bothered to check in, no matter how hard doing it was.
In finding myself this past year, I saw myself becoming more spiritual. I realized that everything happens for a reason whether at the hands of God, or fate, there are things that are out of my control but that doesn’t mean they are going to turn my life upside down, and this is coming from someone who has been in TWO quarantines within the same 25 days. While this hasn’t stopped me from constantly overthinking, it helps to put my mind at ease.
Honestly, I don’t know who I would’ve been if quarantine happened. Looking back to the girl I was ago, I’m shocked how much has changed in myself and my life including my mindset, future, fitness, and relationships. While this global pandemic is something I wish would be over already as I’m sure everyone else does, I wouldn’t have become the person I am today and to me, that would be a shame.
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