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Wellness

Why You Shouldn’t Overthink Text Messages

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Manhattan chapter.

It is so easy to get wrapped up in analyzing the words of people’s text messages. Texting can be much more convenient than calling and it has a 209 percent higher response rate than phone, email, or Facebook (Why Do People Rather Text Than Talk). However, when people use text messaging over picking up the phone and having a conversation, the tone can be unclear and there can be many misunderstandings. 

Sometimes, it can be easier to express oneself in writing rather than speech. Yet, sarcastic jokes or short responses can possibly come off as rude. Although this is true, over analyzing can be self-destructive. 

It is important to be straightforward in your own communication and not play a game with the other person who is probably just trying to do the same. People feed off each other and if someone feels like you are being standoffish or rude, they will be confused and do the same. Here are the three most common phrases that people overthink when used in text messages, and reasons and why you shouldn’t worry. 

“K”

“K” is a commonly used text message usually letting someone know you acknowledged their previous text. However, there can be a hidden meaning behind it. Even though it can be used as a shortened version of “okay” or “OK,” meaning you are in accordance with their last message, it can also mean that they do not feel like texting you anymore. This phrase can be used to prove a point and can be dismissive. Sending a single capital “K” will prove your point and hit it hard. “Did they reply “K” because they’re in a hurry, or are they pissed?” (5 Tips for How to Stop Overanalyzing Those Text Messages). 

“Lol”

“Lol” is the frequently used acronym meaning “laugh out loud.” However today, this acronym no longer gives this same meaning of showing an emotion impossible to express online. According to this article, “lol helped people to pretend to laugh out of politeness or awkwardness, and then became an easy, disinterested throwaway to end a conversation,”(I hate myself lol: Why “laugh out loud” means everything but). By using “lol” as a sarcastic phrase, it now takes the meaning out and makes the receiver overthink the conversation. 

“I’m fine”

“I’m fine” is a normal response to the question “how are you doing,” but this phrase is sometimes easier to say than actually saying how someone feels. By saying “I’m fine” the person asking thinks they are okay and can move on. Today, this can confuse the receiver of the text, because people now say “I’m fine” when they do not want to communicate their actual feelings or they are mad. According to this article, “In the chronic illness world, ‘I’m fine’ masks what we really want to say. It may not reflect how we are truly feeling. A real answer may be extremely more complicated to explain. But a lie is easier for the person asking to hear. A lie takes the pressure off of you. You do not have to explain every ache and pain that you are feeling.” (15 Things I Really Mean When I Say ‘I’m Fine’). 

It is important to look past these changed colloquial phrases and not get anxious over their meanings. These phrases are all used when people are not mature enough to actually communicate their emotions. This makes relationships so much harder than they need to be. Furthermore, even though people put way too much thought or power into text messages, they are just text messages and if someone wants to let you know how they feel, they should come out and say it or call you, and you should do the same.

 

Angelica is so excited to be the leader of this chapter as Campus Correspondent at Her Campus at Manhattan! Originally from the Jersey Shore, Angelica is a senior at Manhattan College studying communication with a concentration in journalism and a minor in French. Angelica is also Features Editor of the campus newspaper The Quadrangle, Fashion and Beauty Editor of Lotus Magazine, and Secretary of Alpha Pi Phi Sorority. She currently interns at The Port Authority of New York and New Jersey in the Brand and Customer Partnerships Department. You can hear Angelica hosting Soundtrack Sunshine, as she DJ’s for Manhattan College’s radio station WRCM. When she finds the time to breathe she likes to go for walks in Van Cortland Park, hang out at An Beal with friends, and watch her roomates dance at the basketball games. Angelica loves to write about anything from her deepest darkest feelings, trendiest clothes on sale, and hot button topics. She loves to share her experiences with all of you and hopes readers can take something from her insight. She encourages anyone with a story to tell to join Her Campus and take a chance on the best girl group in college! Happy reading :)
As an avid lover of all things writing related, Christine is a born story-teller. She is a junior at Manhattan College majoring Public Relations and minoring in Marketing. When she’s not writing, you can find her exploring NYC, binge watching The Office, or enjoying a good cup of tea. She joined Her Campus after transferring to MC and absolutely fell in love with it! She is currently the Campus Correspondent of her chapter, and hopes her articles can entertain and inspire women everywhere. After college, she plans to continue writing and hopes to publish a book one day. Be sure to check out her college lifestyle blog Christineeve.com!