For every budding relationship at Maryland, there is one particular universal fear. Although finding out your significant other has an ex-girlfriend with the mental stability of Carrot Top may seem like it takes the number one spot, but there is something specific to Maryland college life that can be the ultimate deal breaker.
That is…our six week long Winter Break. “How can this be?” You might ask. Well take a look around, how many pre-break budding relationships came out on top after? General consensus says, very few.
It’s not anyone’s fault, it’s just the natural cycle of relationships here at Maryland. You meet a guy, you have a crush, it takes a month to get his number at Bentley’s. Then after a few more weeks, you establish a little stability in the fling, but you want to take it slow, so you do, and before you know it Winter Break is quickly approaching.
Six weeks is a long time to go without seeing each other, and the countdown is a little unnerving. Unfortunately, the adding of a “label” to the relationship (i.e. being exclusively together) can be rushed in an attempt to lock down your new flame before you both go home to mingle with high school friends or exes.
But without the label, how do you know where you stand? If the new fling doesn’t last, would you call it “breaking up”, or not? While interviewing girls on their experiences with the “kiss of death” winter break, I came across this scenario exactly.
Beth*, a spring semester junior, recaps her pre and post break relationship. “We always joked about where we would be when we got back from break. He was POSITIVE we’d still be together, and I constantly used sarcasm to cover up my assumption that we’d probably “break up”.”
Without the “label” talk, the lack of certainty can drive a girl crazy, but once the relationship becomes long distance, the strength of your feelings is obvious.
“To me winter break is a time to put school life on hold, meet up with old exes and crushes, and possibly make what could have been with other boys actually happen. When it came time for him to visit me, like he’d planned on doing, I quickly reconsidered how I felt about him.” Beth says, “I could not wait for him to go home.”
Just as she guessed, Beth and her fling didn’t survive the break, and her return home was like an ice cold bath, a rude awakening. She found that she wasn’t ready for the intense relationship necessary to beat the distance.
Just like Beth shared, it seems that we can get caught up in the bubble of college love. Returning home can remind us how temporary our college lifestyle can be, especially the college relationships.
If you found yourself in this winter break relationship situation, don’t feel like you’re the only one and don’t overanalyze the ending. The post break break-up disaster is an epidemic, so give yourself some time, then get back out there. Who knows…maybe come April you’ll have caught Spring Fever.
*Name has been changed