Three years ago, I used to wonder why people applied for semester/year abroad programs. It was a new concept for me; something unheard of. You spend your first year of university abroad in a new city, with new people, a new culture, and then there are these students who don’t care about classes and just come to explore cities.
I used to look down on students on exchange, saying things like, “Aah these people just want to travel and waste time.” Back then, I never even considered the option of going on a semester exchange; and look at me now!
Fun Fact: My first university friend was an exchange student from McGill.
Earlier this year, I considered going on an exchange because my life was getting quite monotonous. It was the same old, study, perform, make someone proud, have no memories from the semester, struggle with personal issues, sulk, and back to square one. This may sound depressing, but it wasn’t. I guess, almost every other person I know would agree with it. You just get used to it. There are fun times, but in the end, all you care about is that perfect GPA. To change this, I decided to go on exchange.
Why go on exchange to Canada, you ask? Because one of my high school friends moved to Toronto a few years ago. The cultural factor of Montreal attracted me the most, and since Toronto was a few hours away, I applied to McGill and got accepted.
Meanwhile, my personal life was going through turmoil. It was one of the worst times of my life, and I was tempted to go explore a new city, and start from scratch. I thought to myself, “I can’t do this. If I couldn’t keep one thing stable in my life, how terrible would it be to go and start all over again?”
In the end, my family encouraged me to go on exchange. They wanted me to have a change after such a horrible phase in my life. My personal issues outweighed the idea of an exchange and I wanted to stay back and sulk, but I ended up choosing it after that external pressure.
Why is this relevant? Because we all have our doubts and fears. We all have that fear of starting out once again, of struggling to make friends, and we all want to have an identity we are comfortable with and achieve something. The doubt of having a fruitful and rewarding experience drowns our thoughts of trying something new. These doubts and fears are often caused by our present state of mind, and the phase of our lives in which we find ourselves. For me, the horror in my personal life lowered my self confidence, and hence, the fears took over. Others like you, can have a million other reasons, which prevent you from taking this step.
Today, 106 days later, I can proudly say that it’s been one hell of a ride. A ride filled with things like attempting stand-up comedy, writing for Her Campus, being a part of 3 different communities, learning more about Christianity, exploring my faith, participating in a Hackathon, travelling around so many cities, having so many deep conversations, meeting loads and loads of people, hosting Bollywood movie nights, setting up a million study sessions across the entire university, attending all sorts of food events and so much more.
I love this sense of belonging. It is something I struggled with back in my home university and the city. I learned how to love and be loved, and am immensely grateful to all those many amazing people I have met here. These experiences have helped me learn so much about life and become someone better every single day.
What exactly is this sense of belonging? I feel like it’s when your friends make you a cake that says “Thank you” with an Indian Flag. Or maybe receiving plenty of notes from people thanking you for your presence and wanting to meet you later in life. Or perhaps when you trust people like your own family because you know you can always crash on their couch. Countless things can be used to describe this, but I guess you get what I am trying to say.
It wasn’t easy; not at all. I stepped out of my comfort zone every single day in every way possible. I reached as many people I could, heard their life experiences and shared my life stories with them. I invested in so many people and communities with an open-mind and no expectations whatsoever. I did not hold back anything, and was honest with everything I did. Considering the short period, I knew it was going to be tight, and I decided to explore people and culture more than other cities and countries. I did travel, but not so much that I made this an extended North American vacation. I put in my 100% and got more than that in return. It was hard to wake up every day without any expectations from anyone to remember you, but I was motivated and today, I am happy to have found myself a family here. A family filled with beautiful people from diverse backgrounds, yet astonishingly similar mindsets.
You might think that I am this overly extroverted guy, but that’s not true. After my debacle earlier this year, I went through an emotional rollercoaster and took a lot of time to recover. My confidence was at an all time low, I had no mood to come here and no motivation to move forward in life, but I did, and I was able to achieve so much in this short period. I got to discover myself and start loving myself, and that was my highlight from this experience. I put so much pressure about what I faced earlier this year because despite that, I was still able to reach here today. You might have a problem today, and something to worry about tomorrow, but don’t allow that to be the reason that you miss the opportunity to at least try a semester exchange program or explore a new city or country. Don’t let those thoughts get in your way.
Personally, it was not just the semester I exchanged, it’s the culture, love, experience, belief and much more. Some argue it’s not the best academically, but I feel it’s more about the exposure you attain that helps you grow as a person. It’s not something you can Google like every other thing, it’s a journey you need to experience yourself.
One take from this experience? I think, and this is also a tip for you, that every person you meet has a beautiful story and something to teach you. Have an open mind and go have that conversation. You won’t regret it.
I read this once, “Every day is a journey, and the journey itself is home,” and it was the motivation behind this article. It made no sense when I read it for the first time. But as time passed by, I got to explore the meaning behind it. And this is how I try to live. That’s what I want you to try. So go, and live that day.
I hope you have something to take from this article. A good friend once told me, “Go, go be an explorer of infinity!” Now’s your time. Â
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Cheers.
Aman Deep Middha.
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Image/ GiF Sources:
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Other images are the author’s own.