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Sssshh…I have a Secret

Her Campus Placeholder Avatar Myesha Williams
Her Campus Placeholder Avatar Jerrica James
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Memphis chapter.

Hey–I have a secret…and it affects all of us.

 

This secret surrounds the lives of girls that have been sexually assaulted on college campuses. As a matter of fact–girls that are in college institution are more accurate due to college events, living off campus, etc.  I have searched and searched for information, facts, and statistics and came across bestcolleges.com, aauw.com, and time.com which really help me out.

 

The Stats!

Less than 5 percent of rapes and attempted rapes of college students are reported to campus authorities or law enforcement.  One in five college students experiences sexual assault during their college career. The victim is more than likely to be sexually assaulted by an intimate partner at 61.9%–an acquaintance at 21.3%, a relative at 16.7%, and relative/spouse at 6.5%. Intimate partners include current and former spouses, opposite-sex and same-sex cohabiting partners, boyfriends/girlfriends, and dates. Total percentages exceed 100 because some victims had multiple assailants. The majority of sexual assault incidents go unreported, partially due to different social stigmas experienced by men and women who are victims of these crimes.

 

So why do we keep expanding our secret?

Here are some reasons: 

  1. We don’t want anyone to know. Some know that it’s a social risk, especially if it’s someone they know.
  2. “We don’t understand what constitutes rape…The victims’ confusion does not mean that all of these crimes fell somewhere in the gray. More likely, their confusion reflects shame, denial, and internalized misconceptions that rape is always perpetrated by a stranger and involves physical violence, when often, rape happens between acquaintances and involves alcohol, threats, or other kinds of coercion.”
  3. We are afraid the police won’t believe us. Some victims believe the police won’t think it’s seriously and some believe the police will not treat them right.  
  4. “We don’t know how much control they will have after they report to the police…Unfortunately, there is wide discrepancy between how prosecutors and police officers in various jurisdictions handle sex crimes. Some will give broad power and control to the victim, while others may pursue the case against the victim’s wishes.”

Why should we do it?

Because rapists are often repeat offenders. If we don’t save and defend the first victim, then we are basically hurting the next victim(s). 

How do we save ourselves?

  1. Knowing our alcohol limits
  2. Watching our drinks 
  3. Trusting our gut 
  4. Sticking with our friends

How could we help victims? (summarized from bestcolleges.com)

  1. Make the victim feel as safe and listened to as possible.
  2. Inform the victim that the sexual assault was not their fault.
  3. Be a supportive listener. Thank the victim for telling you about this. Avoid phrases that evoke powerlessness at first, including “I’m sorry.”
  4. If you saw the attacker or witnessed any part of the assault, take detailed notes regarding the incident.
  5. Accompany the victim to the hospital and ensure they meet with medical professionals who specialize in sexual assault trauma.
  6. Follow up with the victim. Encourage participation in counseling sessions and support groups.

If we don’t help them, they will have the possibility of suffering from physical after effects (Jitteriness, disrupted sleep patterns, muscle cramps or spasms, no libido, aching at injury sites), emotional after effects (anxiety, self-blame or guilt, rage, helplessness, emotional outbursts, and constant worry), and mental after effects (inability to concentrate, depression, denial, PTSD, and suicidal ideation)

So let’s help the next person. Let’s not stand there and let it happen and/or let them suffer. Any bystander can be so helpful in any situation. Spread the word, stay safe, and be there for any victim, especially to get closure with the case. So please don’t keep this a secret–because you never know if the next victim will be you.

 

 

For more information and resources, please visit these links:

http://www.bestcolleges.com/resources/preventing-sexual-assault/

http://www.aauw.org/resource/campus-sexual-assault-talking-points/

http://time.com/2905637/campus-rape-assault-prosecution/

 
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My name is Myesha and I am second year theatre performance student that loves children and mentoring to teenagers and young adults. I am a resident advisor in one of the residence halls on my school and this is my third semester! I love being involved on my campus and supporting my tigers. I also love studying in coffee shops, hanging out with friends, dancing, and mentoring. Every semester or every one to two months, my schedule change due to shows that I am in and/or clubs, organizations, or events that I get involved in. Nevertheless, my goal is to take something from every experience that I have in college. My dream is to become a teacher (for students aged 6-18) and professional actress. I also have more goals on my bucket list that I want to achieve. I am proud to be apart of my favorite blog website and I hope you enjoy my stories!
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