Self-care can be complicated. But, as a sophomore in college, I have realized that it is now more important than ever to practice it. But I also know this has become more difficult, especially with myself and my peers experiencing the stress that comes with college life during the social media age. We are going through an important period of self-discovery when the opportunity to compare ourselves to anyone and everyone lies at our fingertips. Everything we see is now perfectly curated to a certain aesthetic, even self-care has become something that has been influenced by the social media ideal, with elaborate morning routines and “Get Ready With Me’s” filled with sponsorships and expensive products and scripted daily vlogs.
But life can be complicated, too. And especially in college, it can be stressful. When self-care has become part of a larger conversation about consumerism and the power of influence—for better or for worse—it can be hard to remember that self-care isn’t perfect because our lives aren’t perfect, what we see online isn’t always real, and college life isn’t always how the media we see makes it out to be. I have found since starting college that self-care is so much more than elaborate bubble baths (with bath bombs that would almost definitely give a girl a UTI) and perfectly sunshiny, clean rooms. In this article, I will reflect on some of the tips that (personally) help me as a college girl who sometimes struggles with staying consistent with ordinary self-care in the unrealistic expectations of the social media age. Disclaimer: I am not a mental health professional, these tips are not substitutes for therapy or counseling. If you or someone you know are in crisis or experiencing suicidal thoughts, you are not alone. Please reach out to the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255.Â
Tip #1: Stop that Doom Scroll
The first rule of self-care (in my rule book, anyway) is that your worth is not measured by your productivity. But, sitting on my phone in bed rotting away on a bad day makes me feel worse than how I started. While resting on a bad mental health day is totally valid and very important, scrolling social media mindlessly can be just as draining as pushing yourself to be productive. Doom scrolling sometimes gives negative thoughts more power, even if I think I’m giving myself a distraction. Turning on my phone for what feels like five minutes then looking at the clock when its been an hour makes me feel really guilty, and the vicious cycle starts all over again. Instead, I always try to give myself a healthier distraction that I actually enjoy, like listening to a podcast.
When things get stressful and I find myself in a funk, I also try setting realistic goals for the day. Somedays that could just be getting out of bed and brushing my hair, other days it is making my bed and cleaning my room. Comparison is the thief of joy, and doom scrolling on social media is the fastest way to do that. Being realistic and taking how I feel into account, I have started to realize that not every day will be the same. Not every day will be Instagram-worthy perfect, but doing my best for myself and myself alone—without comparing myself to the progress anyone else online has made—has helped me give myself a bit more grace lately.
Tip #2: Affirm, Affirm, Affirm
When I first heard about affirmations, manifestation, and the like I thought it was so stupid. Like the silly videos and posts that you would see online, prompting you to give them engagement in order to “claim” whatever positivity they were offering. But when I first started taking yoga classes, I noticed my instructor used them all the time. Especially when we were doing something challenging or that might have been outside of our comfort zone. I also noticed myself always walking out of class repeating them to myself in my head, and feeling a little bit more positive towards myself and the coming week.Â
I decided to try and add affirmations to my morning routine. I found that on the worst days, they helped me gain the confidence I need to start my day on a good note. When I look in my mirror in the morning and speak positivity into my day, hearing it out loud makes it feel as if I am simply stating a fact about myself.Â
(Yes, I am strong! I do deserve happiness and success! I love the person I am becoming!)
As a bonus, sometimes seeing myself in the mirror as I say it to myself makes me feel like I am saying it to somebody else. Sometimes we need to show ourselves the love that we give to our friends and family, and affirmations have become a great way for me to practice that. Another great way to practice affirmations is to jot them down in a journal or a daily planner, that way you can flip to one whenever you may need a little pick-me-up/Â
Tip #3: Establish a Routine
My first two years of college have been hands-down the busiest times in my life, but I have found that a routine can be a huge help in practicing self-care. It doesn’t have to be anything crazy like you might see online, but can consist of just setting aside time for yourself daily. For example, something that has really helped me in my self-care is having a skin-care routine. Doing my skincare is a designated time every day and night that I spend doing something for myself that makes me feel better about myself.Â
Freshman year I definitely felt like I was overwhelmed with adjusting to college life, and college did not feel like the storytimes I saw online, or the Instagram stories I saw of my friends from high school. They all looked so happy, and for some reason, I just wasn’t where I thought I would be. My routine at school consisted of driving to school, going to class, and driving home at the end of the day. I began to feel apathetic towards school, and it definitely affected how I saw myself. I wasn’t doing anything at school that really helped my wellness or relieved the stress I was feeling, and was just going through the motions.Â
Sophomore year, I was determined to make a change in my life on campus. Now, exercise classes offered by my school’s fitness and recreation center have become staples in my self-care routine. Through what was once one of my biggest challenges I have found some of the things that bring me the most confidence that I look forward to every week. I no longer feel like college is something that is happening to me, but a part of my life that brings me joy because I am taking care of myself as I move through it.Â
Conclusion
To sum it all up, self-care during your college years is important. But, with all of us going through it during the age of social media, taking care of yourself can be difficult to navigate because of all of the unrealistic expectations that what we see online sets for us. The tips I’ve reflected on in this article have worked for me personally, and may not work for everybody. But, something that you will find in each one of them is how important it is to consistently show up for yourself however that may be. at the end of the day, what you see online might not be realistic to how you live your life. The tips discussed in this article might not either, and that’s ok! Self-care is about what works for you, and only you. Not an influencer, not a brand, not the comments section. Whether that’s a five minute skincare routine or a two second affirmation before heading out to class, it can make all the difference. From one college girl to another, you deserve it.