‘Tis the season to be stressed the heck out because you don’t know what to buy for your special guy. It’s understandable, it really is. If it helps, rest assured that boys have it way worse. That aside, I contacted a number of my collegiette companions, combined their thoughts with my own, and now I have some advice to give all of you who are looking for some help.
There are several variables to consider when thinking of that perfect gift. How much do I spend? Do I ask him what he wants? We’ve only been together for a little while, what should I do?
First: if you’re not totally sure that you should buy him something at all, you need to do one of two things. First: talk to him. Is he under the impression that a gift exchange is happening? You can never go wrong with clear and direct communication. Second: if you’re not willing to ask him, and you’re not sure if you should buy something, you’re probably not in that stage of your relationship yet and it’s best if you just figure that out before thinking about the holidays. Those other two questions will answer themselves in the next couple of sections.
There are two huge umbrella categories for gifts: experience-based gifts and tangible, material gifts. There are pros and cons of each, and I’ll try to spell it out for you.
Tangible, Material Gifts
These are great for a number of reasons. First, there is no scheduling involved, like an event. Second, your guy can keep what you buy him for as long as he lives. (Unless you break up, and he burns things! Yikes…) They’re also easier and faster and often cheaper than the alternative. Ironically, they’re very good for couples that haven’t been together very long, and couples that have been together for awhile. Here’s why. A number of my gal pals have been with their men for a spell, and as such, they’re getting their boys things like musical instruments or clothes that are useful. These gifts are for more than just show because they actually fulfill a purpose.
There are also tangible gifts that all guys can use. Therefore, they’re good for your guy whether you’re close and he has everything he wants, or you barely know the guy. Things like watches, cologne, or wallets work. I’ve been told that “bros love wallets,” whatever that means. However, if he’s a watch guy, he may love the one he’s already got and not be excited about your gift. Cologne is good because you can shop together and pick out something you BOTH like. It’s not just you buying him that crap that he thinks makes him smell good.
If you’re looking to be sweet, and thoughtful, you could always make a gift that suits him. One friend of mine hooked up her cooking obsessed guy with a custom made cookbook packed with recipes they’d both enjoy. Being cute and clever is always a good route to go if you’re in doubt.
Experience-based Gifts
These are my personal favorite, and through my talks with my sources, they usually go over well. Whether experience means a ball game, a concert, a ski trip, couples lessons of some sort (usually a fantastic idea), or even just a “simple” celebration in NYC, experience gifts are good because you get to make a memory. In my book, memories are better than any material thing that I could buy myself.
There are some caveats with these too. Keep the following things in mind. Does he actually like the sport you’ve bought tickets to? Not all guys like basketball or football. Be mindful of his sport faves and his sports teams. Does he like live music? Some people LOVE a band, but might like them less if they hear them live. The key to these gifts is that it is something you can do together, and something you will BOTH enjoy. I understand that “if he’s happy, I’m happy” and “if he’s having fun, I’m having fun.” That’s nice, but if you don’t like football and you go to a December ball game with him, you are NOT going to enjoy yourself. You risk bringing him down, and that’s no gift.
A few miscellaneous tips:
● Consider talking to his mom. She knows him just as much or better than you, and she might be thinking of some of the same gifts. Additionally, she may have insight on his eccentricities and could help you select something he really loves.
● FINALLY, a tip from one of Her Campus’s very own. Think about making a short list, maybe 10 things that you would like. Have him do the same. Trade lists. This will ensure that he gets you something you like, you get him something he likes, but both of you still get to be surprised.
After you’ve read this article, there is no excuse for a bad gift. Thanks to all those who responded to my texts for this blog. I’d thank you specifically, but don’t want your manly men to get any clue as to what’s under the tree for them.
Merry Christmas.