In the past six years, I’ve had some crazy roommates… I mean absolutely crazy. And this doesn’t even just go for females; I’ve had crazy male roommates as well. I’ve had roommates that have been kleptomaniacs, I’ve had a roommate tell me she was just trying to get with my fiancé, and the list can go on and on. So here is a little guide to (hopefully) help you and/or your future roommate understand boundaries!
1. Don’t steal your roommates’ things
I figure this should be an obvious but people like shiny things or things that are not theirs for some inexplicable reason. It’s like they see something that they know is not theirs, so they must take it, use it, and never give it back. This has happened with both male and female roommates that I’ve had in the past, and for some reason both liked to take my clothing. Little odd for a guy, in my opinion, but moving on…
2. Be courteous, don’t leave messes for your roommate to clean up
Another thing I can’t understand is why when you move in with someone, they automatically assume that because you clean, you’re their maid. Yes, I clean. No, I don’t want to pick up your mess. That means if you make food, use dishes, or make any other mess, clean it up afterwards. If you clean as you go it makes it a lot easier! A while ago, I had a girl that said when she moved in with me that she was a clean person. She said she kept things clean and picked up, and that she was a pretty laid back person. Not even a month went by before I found out that all of those were fallacy statements. Dishes were never done and clothes were strewn about the apartment at all times. It constantly looked like a bomb went off.
3. Unless you mean it, don’t speak it
I have always gone by the rule that what you speak is what you mean. So if you say you’re going to say something, do something, be somewhere, I expect that to be what happens — and I have come to the conclusion that a lot of others think this way as well. When I lived out in my one of my old apartments, my roommate was like many others — she said she cleaned, she didn’t; she said she was laid back, she wasn’t. The cycle continued. And like others, she would leave things strewn about and constantly leave messes in the kitchen. I feel like my roommate’s parents never taught them how to properly clean. Because I’m a clean freak and can’t stand to have dishes in the sink for more than two days, I would often get stuck doing them. But she would always say that since I did the dishes all the time that she would clean the bathroom and the living-room of the apartment. It never happened, even with my constant reminders. Moral of the story: if you say you’re going to do something, you should probably do it to avoid stepping on toes.
4. Roommates’ boyfriends are off limits!
Seriously, this one should be self-explanatory. Boyfriends, no matter if they are your roommate, best friend, or even if they are coming on to you, do not do it. This will only lead to conflict between you and your roommate.
5. Talk it out
I’m one of those people that will always think too much conflict is completely and totally unnecessary. Why argue about something stupid like doing the dishes? I like to think of myself as a reasonable person, and other people’s personalities can kind of go the same way. If there is no need for an argument, then don’t argue! If there needs to be a talk, do just that. When I say talk, that doesn’t mean hash everything out over text. Text talking does not work. Most times, the way you text something can come across wrong and someone’s going to end up getting upset. Talking one-on-one in person is the best way to go if you and a roommate have a problem. Even if you are the worst person when it comes to handling conflict, it doesn’t have to result in a fight — a little communication never hurt anyone!
Hopefully my less-than-perfect experiences with roommates can help you avoid conflict and get those dishes done!
*All images courtesy of Giphy