Thanks to Valentine’s day, this time of year can make us feel lonely if we aren’t in a relationship. And when we feel lonely we might think to download Tinder. Oh, Tinder. It’s fun to see who you match with, but it may not always set you up with what you’re looking for. Whether you’re re-downloading it after deleting it for the hundredth time, or it’s your first time making a profile, here are some tips to swipe you to success.
Like it or not, your bio is important.
It may be just a few words, but your bio is important. It’s the first impression a potential match will have of you, outside of your pictures (and your Instagram and Spotify, if they’re linked). Everyone on Tinder seems to love adventures, puppies and long walks to the fridge, but my advice is just be original and you’ll be fine.
Quality over quantity, my friends.
It’s way easier to focus on 3 possible matches than 30. Having a lot of matches is nice and can be entertaining, but it all comes down to why you’re on Tinder. If you actually might want to meet up with someone, the idea that they’re one out of a handful of options, instead of one in a crowd, will give them the attention they deserve and allow you to make a move if you want to. Also, don’t let the amount of matches you have discourage you ever.
Don’t be afraid to send the first message.
It’s neither party’s responsibility to send the first message. You could match with someone, but never even have a conversation with them. Maybe you’re feeling shy, which is completely understandable, but if things don’t work out, there are hundreds of others you could match with AND you never have to see that person if you don’t want to.
Matching with someone you know, however, opens up an entirely different path of conversation. Don’t be scared because you know each other; take it as a blessing. Make a joke about finding each other on Tinder and be grateful that if you do meet up, there’s a familiar face waiting for you! I’m sure they’re just as nervous as you are, but it’ll only be awkward if you make it awkward.
Make your intentions clear.
Tinder is referred to as an online dating app, but really you can use it for what you want. Looking for something serious or just a hook-up? Tinder can provide both options. Tinder can even be used for making friends. But the key to Tinder is making your intentions clear. Not only will it make things easier for you, but it’ll also make it easier for your matches and that way (hopefully) no one ends up getting hurt. Not sure of someone’s intentions? Ask! If they get offended or defensive, you know they aren’t the right match for you and you can move on.
Be confident.
Agree or disagree, you’re a prize. You can be picky on Tinder, that’s why it’s amazing. Don’t settle for someone who you don’t think you’ll like, and don’t let not matching with someone get you down. A meet-up didn’t go as planned? Don’t take it personally. Sparks don’t fly every time, go into your next meet-up with even more confidence than the last!
Give out your Snapchat with discretion.
For all of my straight ladies out there, it’s no secret that dudes love Snapchat. What is more appealing than sending photos back and forth that disappear after you view them? With that in mind, if you give out your Snap to some randos you’ve never met up with (or even ones you have!) you may be getting some (dun, dun, dun) UNSOLICITED DICK PICS (if this happens to you, here is a list of 20 possible gifs you can send in response).
Don’t be afraid to back out at any time.
Whatever you choose to use Tinder for, know that you are not required to follow through on anything. Whether that be messaging back, finishing a date or hooking up – if anything makes you uncomfortable, you don’t have to follow through. Plan an escape route in case things go south. Always meet in a public place, and if at any point something makes you uncomfortable, get out!
Tinder not working out? Don’t be discouraged!
Tinder can be frustrating and even overwhelming, especially for my gay ladies out there. You are never sure if the girl you’re talking to is into you or is just looking for a friend. I have been burned once or twice by gals just looking for pals and it’s super disheartening. While Tinder is still super fun to use, know that there are other apps out there. HER is a great app for queer womyn, gender non-binary and transgender men and women looking for people to get together! Tinder isn’t for everyone, but it’s super accessible and even though it might be intimidating at first, you’ll be surprised with how easy (and addicting) it becomes.
Happy swiping, Gophs!