Collegiettes, do we have a treat for you. That’s right- not one, not two, but three campus cuties! These men represent Mizzou’s very own “Comedy Wars,” and trust us, seeing this eye candy is well worth your Wednesday nights. Sweet, hilarious, and Pitch Perfect obsessed (?!), these men are sure to make you “Swoon”, so check them out!
Name/Year in school: Jake Wallach, Sophomore
Hometown: Creve Couer, Mo.
Major: Journalism with a hint of Convergence
Campus Involvement: MU Improv, Comedy Wars, MU Sketch, Summer Welcome Leader, Outreach
Relationship Status: Single
Favorite Pick-Up Line: “Oh, you like farmer’s markets too?” (Most successful in Farmer’s Markets)
Most embarrassing moment: My senior year I was in my high school’s musical. I was hanging out backstage while they rehearsed a dance number with all 20+ girls in the show, and I hear them singing “Happy Birthday.” I decide to run from backstage to the group to join in, not knowing there was an accumulation of sawdust on the side of the stage. This made me fall into the splits and rip my jeans down the crotch for all my lovely female co-stars to see.
3 Turn-Ons: Intellect, humor and optimism.
3 Turn-Offs: Apathy, Jealousy, and those Facebook statuses that are in a letter format. For example:
Dear Blank
Can you please stop being so awkward?!
Love,
Me.
Last song played on iPod: “This Head I Hold” by Electric Guest
My guilty pleasure is: A Cappella music, definitely. Have you seen Pitch Perfect?
My idea of a perfect date is: I’m a fond believer of dinner and a show. Whether that be a movie, improv show, or play I’m down for it. After that, a stroll around a park is a great way to end the night, hopefully with some ice cream.
What I look for in a girl is: A girl that I can joke around with, someone that doesn’t take herself too seriously, and doesn’t mind me asking her to read smaller print for me. A girl with all functioning organs is a bonus.
One thing on my bucket list is: Hike the Appalachian Trail.
My favorite Mizzou memory so far is: My first Comedy Wars show was amazing.
My celebrity crush is: Female: Anna Kendrick. Have you seen Pitch Perfect?
Male: Leonardo DiCaprio HAVE YOU SEEN PITCH PERFECT?!
In 10 years I will be: Celebrating the 10-year anniversary of being a Campus Cutie and hopefully having my own show at iO (Improv Olympix)
Name/Year in school: Clint Cannon, Sophomore
Hometown: St Louis, Mo. (more specifically: Manchester)
Major: English & Communication Major, Theater Minor
Campus Involvement: Comedy Wars, MU Improv, Summer Welcome and Department of Student Activities (Special Events Committee)
Relationship Status: Single
Favorite Pick-Up Line: I lost my number. Can I borrow yours?
Most embarrassing moment: In high school, I tried to buy Skittles and a rose for a girl on Valentines Day, and the head of the rose fell off on my way to her, and the bag of skittles broke open when I handed them to her. She thought I was an idiot.
3 Turn-Ons: Dimples, a girl who reads, funny
3 Turn-Offs: Smoking Cigarettes, being clingy, burping
Last song played on iPod: “Swoon” by Timeflies
My guilty pleasure is: Candy. I always have some around and I eat way too much.
My idea of a perfect date is: On the perfect date we would do something active like ice skating and then find a cool place to chill like a park or a cliff or a really comfy couch, and we’d talk for a long time about stuff that doesn’t really matter, and then, hopefully, I would kiss her before we leave.
What I look for in a girl is: I look for a girl who is outgoing, smart, pretty and can be as sarcastic to me as I’m bound to be to them.
One thing on my bucket list is: Visit the Colosseum in Rome.
My favorite Mizzou memory so far is: My favorite Mizzou Memory is climbing the tree outside of Rollins and waving to my friends in Gillett’s 7th Floor Lounge.
My celebrity crush is: Emma Watson
In 10 years I will be: A comedian and hopefully acting or writing for TV or Movies.
Name/Year in school: Drew Kohler, Sophomore
Hometown: Riverside, Ill.
Major: Communication, Theater Minor
Campus Involvement: Comedy Wars, MU Improv and Summer Welcome Review Coordinator
Relationship Status: In a relationship
Favorite Pick-Up Line: “Ay Yo girl, I like I like I like what I see, lets go to Hyvee and get some CHInese.”
Most embarrassing moment: At my grandpa’s funeral I yelled at the priest in the middle of his speech, “Hey look everybody, it’s the black Power Ranger.”
3 Turn-Ons: A good pair of eyes, a nice smile and easy to talk to
3 Turn-Offs: Detroit Red Wings fans, dark chocolate and being around mosquitoes.
Last song played on iPod: “House Boat Babies” by Reptar
My guilty pleasure is: Poptarts and Milk. I gobble that sh**. For real.
My idea of a perfect date is: My idea of a perfect date starts with a nice salmon and ends with the movie Miracle. Who’s to say what happens in between?
What I look for in a girl is: I look for a friendly face and a chipper attitude.
One thing on my bucket list is: Go to a New York Mets game
My favorite Mizzou memory so far is: making Comedy Wars
My celebrity crush is: Emma Watson
In 10 years I: Don’t want to know who I am or where I’m going.