The Bachelor Season 23 Recap

Anyone who knows me knows that I live for my shows. From my current Netflix binge, to Riverdale on Wednesdays, to Brooklyn Nine-Nine on Thursdays, to yes, Bachelor Monday. I watch every kind of show from award-worthy to guilty pleasure to just plain poorly written, and yet I enjoy them all. The Bachelor definitely falls into the guilty pleasure category, but it’s so much more than that. Watching the Bachelor provides me with endless entertainment, Twitter memes, and allows for me to form opinions on what I find acceptable in dating and what I don’t.

This goes without saying but, spoilers ahead!

For those of you who don’t know about the genius that is ‘The Bachelor’, hosted by the genius that is Chris Harrison, The Bachelor season begins with 30 women introduced in the first episode. In each episode, there is at least one group date and one “one-on-one” date with one of the women and the bachelor. After a week of dates, there is typically a cocktail party for the girls and the bachelor to have some last moments together before the rose ceremony. At the rose ceremony, the bachelor gives out a certain number of roses to the women he wants to stay. Women that don’t receive a rose pack up and go home.

This years group of bachelorettes included Sydney Lotuaco, a 2014 Marymount Manhattan alum with a Bachelor of Fine Arts in dance. Sydney was also a resident advisor for three years.

This season of the Bachelor is unique for a few reasons. For one, we previously watched this season’s bachelor, former NFL player Colton Underwood, fall hard for the last bachelorette Becca Kufrin on her season of The Bachelorette. This season, Colton came back to find love and lose something else. A very prominent theme this season has been the fact that Colton is a virgin and has been waiting to fall in love before he loses his virginity. Although for a virgin, Colton got hot and heavy with a lot of the girls very quickly.

As always, this season had its share of drama between the bachelorettes in the mansion. Hannah Brown, former Miss Alabama, had previously known Caelynn Miller-Keyes, former Miss North Carolina, from when they were both up for Miss USA. The two had been friends before the drama of the pageant world caused them to have a serious falling out. Although competition is not new to them, the two girls had no idea they would both be competing for Colton’s heart before the season began. Of course, feelings and rumors came up, leading Colton to decide who to trust and what to believe. I watched this entire season and I can say without a doubt, that Caelynn started this mess. My sister, who also watched this entire season, claims it was Hannah B. You’re going to have to watch yourself to determine how it all started.

Lines were once again drawn between Nicole Lopez-Alvar and Onyeka Ehie over – and my sister and I can agree on this – literally nothing. From what I can recall Onyeka mentioned something to Colton that she perceived to be true about Nicole, which did nothing short of start WW3 between the girls. Accusations were thrown, tears were shed and it quickly spiraled during a cocktail party to which Colton could hear as he was having a conversation with someone else. An angry walk on the beach caused Colton to clear his head enough to send both girls home.

And finally, perhaps the pettiest of all the fights, we have Demi Burnett VS Courtney Curtis. It’s hard to describe Demi to someone who hasn’t been watching all season, but she has definitely been one of my favorite contestants this season. Demi has never been shy about taking her moment with Colton, which may have cut into Courtney taking hers. In true bachelor fashion, the situation quickly escalated to some truly heinous things being said. “Cancer of the house”?! But in the end, Demi prevailed because Courtney and Tracy Shapoff, who had previously gotten into it with Demi, both went home that same night. The devil works hard, but Demi works harder.

These dramatic feuds came back towards the end of the season during the “Women Tell All” episode in which Chris sat down with all the previous women, minus the final three, and dished.

I wouldn’t say we got a resolution to most of the feuds, but we did get a part two. Including Demi and Courtney going at it again. But I have to be with Demi on this one. How is Courtney going to call Demi immature and then (and this did happen) forcibly try to stick a pacifier in her mouth? For some of the women, it was the first time seeing Colton after being unfairly dumped and tough conversations were had. Caelynn, who had gotten dumped right after hometowns – yes, she took Colton to her home town to meet her family and then was sent home – looked to Colton for a little closure. I’m not certain she got what she was looking for.

In addition to the classic mansion drama, the footage we had been teased with all season was a shocking video of Colton jumping a fence and disappearing into the night. Chris dubbed this “the most shocking moment in bachelor history”.

Colton essentially made Bachelor history for being the first bachelor to go from 30 women to 0. That’s right, despite multiple women telling Colton throughout the season that Cassie Randolph was not ready for a relationship, Colton fell hard and fast. When it came time for fantasy suites, Colton laid it all on the line and told Cassie that he was in love with her. Cassie, however, wasn’t so sure. After an impromptu talk with her father, who flew to Portugal to speak with Cassie, she decided that she could not commit to Colton at the time and left him. Which prompted his very rational reaction to hop the fence of the resort and take off. After Chris and the crew had managed to track him down, Colton knew what he had to do.

The next day, Colton broke it off with Tayshia Adams and Hannah Godwin, the other two women accompanying him to the fantasy suites. In a heartbreaking episode, Colton had no women by his side, just a stubborn notion to win Cassie back. Sure enough, Colton went to Cassie and asked for her to take him back. The couple spent a lot of time talking it out together, and Colton even took Cassie to meet his family who happened to be vacationing in Spain.

Since then, Cassie and Colton have been taking it “one day at a time”. Which is a shocking surprise considering how badly Colton’s been itching to put a ring on it all season long. As sure as Colton was this season that he was looking for a wife, I guess things change in the face of true love.

The best thing, in my opinion, that comes from the end of this bachelor season (aside from Colton finally losing his virginity) is the news that Hannah B will be the new bachelorette!

This Miss Alabama star will be back on our TV’s in May to hand out some roses of her own and I can’t wait. Something tells me she won’t be jumping any fences in heels, though. All in all, it was a wild season full of love, feuds, emotions, and some truly crazy moments from everyone. I wasn’t personally the biggest fan of Colton, but I’m happy for him and Cassie and hope they find everything they’ve been looking for in each other.

• The Bachelor