Romance was never a prominent experience in life for me. Actually, before college, it wasn’t really ever an experience at all.
I know what you’re thinking, Then why is this girl compelled to write an article giving dating advice?
Let me remind you, the one and only legend herself, Miss Abby Lee Miller, was a terrible dancer. Absolutely atrocious. However, you’d be sadly mistaken if you don’t think that woman took a bunch of six-year-olds and made them champions for years to come.
I feel like I am Abby Lee Miller spiritually, and I am more than qualified to coach my friends on their personal lives.
However, I sadly got a man to like and date me so I couldn’t say “coaches don’t play anymore” when giving advice.
In all, I’ve been a life coach for numerous teenage girls and some guys. I’ve dated, I’ve had flings, I’ve done it all. If there’s anything I’m qualified to give, it’s dating advice. I have been analyzing, in extreme precision, every single relationship or “situationship” I’ve ever had.
First of all, never settle for anyone less than what your ideal partner is. If you want a partner who’s good at communicating, don’t try and fix somebody who hasn’t given you what you want. Find a new person. Find someone who reflects the same morals, values and qualities you have. Relationships that have people who settle and whose personalities don’t align will never make it long term, so don’t waste your time.
Don’t rush into a relationship. The key to a healthy romantic relationship is taking your time and truly getting to know what you’re getting yourself into. Especially in college, we have all the time in the world to date, and there’s no reason to rush something so beautiful. Personally, I even enjoy the stage of just enjoying one another’s company without labels.
Listen to your friends. Please. Outsider views really do have meaning, and it’s not just your friends being haters. If they’re really concerned about your happiness and everyone you know is telling you not to go for someone, there’s a reason why. A lot of successful relationships occur when someone’s friends like their partner. My best friend has a great boyfriend who has been nothing but sweet and respectful to me. Someday, I’d love to consider him a friend as well.
Date someone who puts in the effort! They may like you and care about you, but never waste your time feeling like you are underappreciated and unloved! The right person will make you feel like royalty, and they will go above and beyond your expectations for dating. If you’re with someone you feel doesn’t put in the effort, don’t waste your golden years and end it ASAP.
Pay attention to who they admire and idolize. This one’s not something everyone realizes, but it’s one of the most important. You can’t expect someone who admires and supports a bigot, racist, homophobe, sexist, etc. person to not be the same way! If they support someone like Chris Brown, who has evidence against him that shows he repeatedly beat women, what makes you think they’ll respect you? Any decent person can absolutely not separate the art from the artist and have the tiniest bit of morals.
Lastly, never work to get someone to like you. Never think to yourself, Are they gonna like me more if I was a blonde? If you’re in a confusing six-month talking stage, save yourself from relating to a Taylor Swift album and wait for someone to love you for you. Keep your sanity and just wait for the right person to come along, even if it takes a while. Being single isn’t bad when you know how to make yourself happy!
In the end, keep your happiness. You’re the number one priority. Don’t let some Tinder dude ruin the best years of your life!